#ugh I wish men were better

[lovelybucky1]

Oooohh i have a request!:

Playing “never have i ever” or something like that with logan and wade (maybe along the lines of a boring friday night with nothing else to do) and you admit to never having an orgasm by anyone but yourself

Flash forward you’re in logan’s arms and wade is eating the fuck out of your pussy, and then they switch 👀👀

i’ve written something similar two the second part here, but i love the never have i ever idea! // divider from @strangergraphics

boredom isn’t something heroes are used to. there’s always something happening somewhere, someone needing to be saved. but tonight, everything is quiet. the three of you were suspicious at first, but you checked every police scanner, news outlet, and all of your contacts and came up with nothing. the bad guys had decided to take an evening off, and now you were stuck with nothing to do.

you, wade, and logan all sit around in the living room with bottles of beer. you and wade stare at the mindless gameshow on tv while logan rests his eyes. you’re definitely bored, but wade is restless. it’s like he’s itching for something to do, like his body is physically unable to handle the inactivity.

“why don’t we play a game?” wade asks, startling logan awake.

the two of you look over at wade. “what kind of game?” you ask.

“i don’t know, ‘never have i ever?’”

logan rolls his eyes, then shuts them again. he’ll deny any “old man” comments, but he really is one. you elbow logan in the side and he opens them again.

“come on, it’ll be fun,” wade pleads.

“it’s not like we have anything better to do,” you say to logan. reluctantly, he agrees.

you reposition yourselves in the living room. you sit on the couch, leaned against the arm with your feet in logan’s lap, who sits on the other end. wade sits on the floor by the coffee table, his beer on the table without a coaster next to him.

“this is your game, wilson. you start,” logan says before taking a sip of his beer.

“no, don’t drink! you only drink if you’ve done the thing i say,” wade scoffs. how can logan be so old and still know nothing about fun? “okay, okay. never have i ever… gotten arrested.”

you furrow your eyebrows at him while logan takes a drink. you’re almost certainly wade has been arrested before. “i don’t think you’re playing this game right,” you say. “you have to say things you’ve never done.”

wade scoffs. “i haven’t been arrested, thank you very much. all the cops who’ve tried have mysteriously ended up with broken noses.”

you roll your eyes at him. “my turn now? never have i ever… cheated on a partner.”

both of them take drinks, wade with more shame than logan. ugh, men.

then it’s logan’s turn. “never have i ever worn a dress.”

you figure it’s targeted at you, just because logan’s a dick, but to your surprise, wade drinks too. logan raises his eyebrow at him, silently urging him to elaborate.

“you wish you saw that, huh, peanut?” he taunts instead. logan makes a face at that.

“i’m thankin’ god i didn’t have to.”

you play a couple more rounds, all three of you exchanging stories and sipping from your bottles. it takes a lot to get them drunk, but you’re starting to feel it. there’s a collection of empty bottles, mostly beer, but halfway through the game, wade decided to up the ante with some liquor.

it’s wade’s turn again and he says, “never have i ever been with two guys at once.”

he means it as a joke. he doesn’t expect anyone to drink. there’s no way logan would do something like that, and you’re too innocent. that’s why his eyes practically pop out of his head when you throw back the shot.

the game turned sexual a few rounds ago, but it was pretty mild stuff. talk about doing stuff in public, kinks, freaky shit like that. nothing as interesting as this.

both wade and logan turn their full attention to you, eager to hear this story.

“what?” you play dumb.

“two guys at once?” wade asks. you shrug.

“it wasn’t anything.”

“nah,” logan says, sounding interested for the first time all game. “you gotta tell us.”

you sigh. “it was a while ago. i met this couple at a bar and they said they were looking for a third. i had nothing better to do and they were both hot, so…” you trail off, shrugging again.

“give us the gory details. how’d you do it? daisy chain?eiffel tower? double cowgirl? triple spooning? come on, tell us,” wade rambles.

“you’re a fucking perv,” you tell him and he doesn’t deny it. “it was just normal dp.”

logan raises an eyebow. “that stands for double penetration,” wade tells him.

“i know that. i’m just wondering how you took it all,” logan says.

you’re used to this kind of talk from wade. the man thinks with his dick so much that you question if he even has a brain. you’re not, however, used to this from logan. he’s no prude, but he usually doesn’t participate in these kinds of conversations with wade.

“must’ve been a tight fit,” logan adds on.

you look between the men and their interested faces. you’re still pretty bored, the game having grown stale a while ago, and now you’re a tipsy. you want something exciting and right now, you’re feeling bold enough to persue it.

“do you wanna see?” you ask them.

wade and logan share a glance, but it only takes a second before they’re replying “yes” in unison.

[ariasakka]

Viktor arcane smut

Talks of body insecurity, smut, fluff, 18+, female reader, similar/same age as Viktor, pussy eating, etc

Nobody has been able to make you cum before. Your best friend Viktor can help you with that.

If anything in this makes you uncomfortable at any point please don’t continue to read. <3

Enjoy ;)

Viktor is your best friend and has been in love with you for years. Jayce keeps hitting on you but you don’t like him. Viktor feels a little jealous every time someone flirts with you especially Jayce but tries not to let it be seen.

You often spend the night at Viktors place because hes your only friend and you’re his closest friend.

You and Viktor were gifted some fancy drinks after presenting your new idea to the council. You both go back to his place after and decide to celebrate. That and neither of you really feel like being alone. After all you both get along with each other better than anyone else. No one knows the two of you better than one another. Late night talks are always both of your favorite. After a few glasses of the worst alcoholic beverage you and Viktor have ever tasted you both lay down on his bed feeling tipsy and exhausted.

Viktor

“I saw Jayce eyeing you all day again.”

You

“Ugh I know, wish he’d leave me alone.”

Viktor chuckles lightly

“You don’t like him back at all? Not even a little?”

You

“I don’t want Jayce. He’s barely even an acquaintance in my eyes. I’ve always gone for men like Jayce. Not because I find any of them attractive but because I feel like I have to. To feel more feminine…or maybe not even just feminine. I guess more petite next to them? Womanly? Weak? I don’t know. None of them have ever been able to make me finish either. But I guess that’s my fault. It can’t be this hard to cum for other women. I don’t really see a point in dating if I don’t find hardly any men attractive plus they don’t satisfy me at all regardless of the non existent orgasm.”

Viktor

“Have you seriously never came with someone else before?”

You

“…no”

Viktor

“Does foreplay not make it easier? Or at the very least more enjoyable?”

You laugh

“Foreplay? That only exists in fiction. Men are not into that thing.”

Viktor

“Boys are not into that sort of thing. What about oral? Clitoral stimulation with the tongue? I feel as though that can always do the job. It’s not too rough nor too gentle. It’s quite intimate and romantic at the same time.”

You

“Um…no man I’ve been with as ever been into that.”

Viktor

“What?!”

You

“Not necessarily because of me they’ve always just said they don’t do that to any woman because “it’s weird” or whatever.”

Viktor sighs

“Let me guess they request oral from their women though.”

You

“Um well….i suppose..”

Viktor

“I feel sorry for you. I assure you men who are actually interested in women don’t prioritize their cock.”

You

“Then what would they even get out of sex if not that?!”

Viktor

“Do you really think men can’t enjoy sex if their dick isn’t involved in the equation?”

You

“Well yes. All men are like that. Aren’t they?..”

Viktor

“Absolutely not. Again men *who are actually into women* will be just as if not more satisfied with his face inbetween her legs.”

You

“…”

Viktor

“Real men have far more enjoyment with foreplay or oral, etcetera than just boring average penetration. It is not impossible for you to cum. You have just been unlucky with men who should look into fucking men or better yet themselves.”

You

“I guess. I’m still convincing myself it’s impossible though.”

Viktor

“Tsk. Jayce is nice but he would probably not know how to satisfy a woman so I suppose you are dodging a bullet there my friend.”

You chuckle and nod in agreement.

Viktor

“Well…what about Jayce’s looks? Do you like him in that regard?”

You

“He’s far from my type in looks as-well.”

Viktor teases

“Do you prefer even more muscular men then?”

You laugh

“Absolutely not! Quite the opposite actually but i always feel huge next to them. If I found a man i actually like he’d never go for someone like me. If he wouldn’t find my body unattractive he’d probably be put off by my strength. Men are always so inscure when I’m stronger than them..”

Viktor feels a warm feeling in his chest when he hears you say “quite the opposite” in hopes he’s closer to your type. That feeling quickly fades when he hears you insult yourself.

Viktor

“You can’t possibly think that can you?!”

You

“What?”

Viktor moves his face closer to yours on the bed in annoyance. He has to make sure you actually hear his words. Take them in. Believe them. You putting yourself down like this is making his head spin.

Viktor

“One you can’t possibly think you’re big. You’re quite small. For Christ sake you’re average height. Two you do not have to be this stupid beauty standard of stick and bone to be beautiful. Three you’re far from huge. Thats never once been a thought in my mind. Four you’re strong. Very strong but any man put off by that is a weak one!”

You

“There are women smaller.”

Viktor

“And you’re still the most beautiful one of them all.”

You

“You don’t have to be nice to me Viktor. I’m just rambling nonsense.”

Viktor

“All women have their own insecurities of course but I truly mean it. I do. You are the most stunning woman I’ve ever laid eyes on. I truly mean that. I’ve always thought that. I can’t possibly understand how you could think differently.”

You

“I-“

As he was talking he didn’t notice his face had gotten so close you yours now that your his nose was brushing against your cheek. He was so mesmerized with your beauty. So taken aback that you couldn’t see what he saw that with every word he spoke he grew closer and closer to you getting lost in your beauty. He can feel your warm breath against his face. He can hear every shaky breath you take. He was unsure before if you’d ever feel for him an ounce of what he felt for you. In that moment he knew you felt something. He could tell with every fiber of his being. He didn’t care if you felt the exact same intensity for him as he did for you at least he knew you felt something for him and that was enough. All he wanted to do was to please you. Make your legs shake. To make you feel loved. To cherish you. To hold you.

You both paused for a moment. He was lost in thought of you. Before you had time to respond he placed a gentle kiss on your warm lips. To his surprise you reciprocated. You gently tugged on his shirt pulling him in for more. He had always been your type. Always been the one you wanted. What you needed. You were too afraid to ever let him know before. Worried he wouldn’t feel the same way. Most importantly even more worried to push away your best friend. Your only friend. You didn’t know if what Viktor was feeling was just lust or love. The way he was kissing you. The way he was talking to you. It couldn’t help but make you feel as though it was both. You had never felt something this intense. Not even sex made your body react this way. You never wanted it to end.

Viktor felt intoxicated and it wasn’t just from the alcohol. Viktor hovered his hand above your waist desperately wanting to feel your skin with his hands but waited for your okay. You gave him a nod in approval when you saw his hand. With your nod he places his thin fingers on your waist gently tracing them under your shirt. Viktor pulled you closer to him with each kiss until neither of you get any closer together. He couldn’t help but let out soft whimpers into your mouth and tighten his grip on your hip every time you tugged on his shirt.

Viktor pulled away from your lips for a moment. He looked at you with need.

Viktor

“Please, please, I want to make you feel good.”

You

“I- I can’t finish you know that.”

Viktor groans

“I know you can. And if you really can’t at all then I at least know I can make you feel pleasure, please.”

You don’t respond too lost in the way he’s looking up at you with desire.

Viktor traces his fingers gently from your waist down to your legs to your knees then back up again.

Viktor

“I can’t let you live your whole life without feeling pleasure.”

You

“Y-yes. Fuck, yes. Just..do whatever you want.”

Viktor leaves your skirt on. He places soft passionate kisses along your neck while undoing your pants bringing them to your knees. You help him by kicking your pants fully off having them fall to the floor. Viktor slides his hand down on top of your panties and gently traces circles over your clit.

Viktor

“Do you want me to make your pussy feel good?”

You nod in response. You can’t help but moan in excitement as he starts to move his fingers up and down your wet slit over your panties.

You wonder if you’re feeling this good because of his skill or just because it’s Viktor.

Once he can tell you’re soaked, Viktor slowly slides your panties off. Admiring your bare pussy intensely starting to drool a bit at the mouth.

Viktor

“Fuck such a pretty pussy. Can I give it a kiss? Please?”

You

“Mm yes you may.”

Viktor slides himself down on the bed until his face reaches your cunt. He lays on his stomach and presses his face down into your folds. Smothering himself in your juices. He gently traces his tongue along your clit. Gripping your thighs in place as you start to shake from pleasure. You were already feeling so much bliss you couldn’t imagine what on earth an orgasm could feel like. How could you possibly feel better than this.

Once he can tell you’re enjoying this and getting used to the feeling he slides two fingers inside slowly. Gently thrusting them back and forth. Fuck you never knew sex could feel this good. After a while you start to unconsciously buck your hips into his face. When he notices this he starts to scissor his fingers inside of your hole sticking his tongue in between his fingers rapidly licking your insides. With his other hand he gently holds two fingers to your clit. He doesn’t move them, Viktor doesn’t want to overstimulate you too much. The bucking of your hips should stimulate his fingers on your clit enough. Viktor can feel you getting closer and closer to release. His boxers are soaked with precum from the sight of you. The taste of you. The sound of you. If he was to grind into the mattress he could cum in under five minutes but he won’t. He’ll hold back. This is about your pleasure. A few more licks deep in your cunt and your gushing cum all over his face. It doesn’t matter how much you shake his face never leaves your pussy it’s like he’s glued to it. He groans as he tastes your cum. The sight of him licking up every drop is making your brain go numb.

Once he’s cleaned you up he sucks your juices off his fingers before bringing his body up in between your legs. Resting his face in the crook of your neck, holding you close.

Viktor

“Did I do alright?”

You

“You did perfect. I didn’t know I was capable of feeling that good.”

Viktor smirks and says smugly

“I knew you could cum.”

You smack his arm gently in response before wrapping your arms around his back. Holding him tightly. He feels so good like this. You’ve wanted to hold him like this for so long.

You

“Do you..want me to do anything to you?”

Viktor

“No, no. This is all I needed. Do me one favor though?”

You

“Anything.”

Viktor

“Stay here tonight. In my bed. Let me fall asleep in your arms like this. Let me call you mine tomorrow.”

You

“Call me yours?”

Viktor

“Is it not painstakingly obvious I’m in love with you? Do you not feel an ounce of the same?”

You

“I’ve felt the same for a while. I just..I just didn’t think you felt that too. Or maybe I didn’t want to believe it because it would be too good to be true.”

Viktor

“Let me keep being too good to be true. Please. Let me spoil you. As more than a friend. Be mine.”

You

“I’m yours.”

[cl6teen]

affection, ln4 ❀ chapter i. clueless

masterlist || chapter ii

in which everyone can’t believe that a certain mclaren driver and f1’s resident rich girl aren’t dating already

contains: smau, oblivious lando & oblivious reader

liked by landonorris, carlossainz55, danielricciardo, and 223,211 others

yourinstagram a much needed vacay

view all comments

landonorris im still offended by the lack of an invite

yourinstagram thailand is for the girls, not sorry!

bsfsinstagram there was a strict no lando norris rule for yn

user i have gyat to go to thailand

liked by yourinstagram

carlossainz55 the book is upside down dummy

yourinstagram i’ll turn you upside down

oscarpiastri what an informative post yn

yourinstagram hehe, can’t wait to see you

user omg yn at the next race???

user literally what are all these f1 boys doing in her comments

user shes a nepo baby i think

user her dad is mclaren’s biggest sponsor so she’s able to attend a lot of f1 events

user my fav honorary f1 wag

yourinstagram wag?? i’m very much single thank you

daniel ricciardo 🌚

yourinstagram don’t give them things to read into daniel.

lanny

i miss you

hey yn

miss youuu

when are you coming back

thailand can’t be that fun

y/n/n

thailand is totally that fun

in fact we’re about to go on a boat

lanny

you can go on a boat over here

y/n/n

it’s not the same 🙄

i don’t know why you’re so hung up about me taking a vacation

monaco gets boring sometimes

lanny

yeah but the second i get back from racing around the world you’re already gone

y/n/n

well i’ll be in the uk just in time for silverstone

lanny

you’re going back home?

y/n/n

my father said it’d be good to be around for a home race

so i’ll be in the uk for some time probably, it’s been a while since i’ve been back

lanny

okay good

i better see you cheering for me

it’d be embarrassing if my best friend was rooting for someone else

y/n/n

i’ve got my mclaren 4 cap ready to go

cant wait to see you ❤️

liked by yourinstagram, oscarpiastri, maxfewtrell and 533,444 others

lando.jpg home dump

view all comments

yourinstagram and it’s all just a bit too much…for littol lando norris

lando.jpg im hiding in your walls

yourinstagram creep

maxfewtrell stream time? 🤔

lando.jpg let me race first bro

user not lando feeding yn pasta and lobsterrrr

carlossainz55 aye, was this a date??

yourinstagram he wishes, he got me from the airport & we went straight to eat

danielricciardo who’s that cutie?

yourinstagram i’m right here!

danielricciardo oh..i meant lando

oscarpiastri 😬

user im so confused, are they dating??

user no, but they’ve been like best friends since lando’s rookie year in mclaren

user shes better than me, i would have fallen in love…

liked by mclaren, landonorris, oscarpiastri, and 745,234 others

yourinstagram couldn’t be prouder of my boys!!

tagged landonorris and oscarpiastri

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mclaren loving the love from our papaya girl 🧡

yourinstagram mwah

user yn ate today on the paddock

user she’s wearing lando’s hat im gonna cry

bsfsinstagram ugh get these men off my feed and show me ur pretty face

yourinstagram i was held at gunpoint and told to post this :/

landonorris the 6th photo…

yourinstagram ikr can you believe that loser got p2?

landonorris not too much now

oscarpiastri i look crazy

yourinstagram you look so cute??

oscarpiastri you shoved a camera in my face while i was eating

yourinstagram i did nothing wrong 🥰

user who was the man you were with on the paddock though?

yourinstagram my father!

user girl your daddy fine

liked by bsfsinstagram

bsfsinstagram user you have great taste

maxfewtrell send me that lando photo please

yourinstagram will do 🫡

45 likes

onlyyn i luv a good arfter prty

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danielricciardo me when i’m on the hennessy

onlyyn hehe

landonorris im looking for you

bsfsinstagram please don’t do anything crazy babe 😭

onlyyn i’ll try

lanny

y/n

where are you?

i thought you were with oscar

y/n/n

i let oscar leave! he looked tired

lanny

you should’ve told me that then

i would’ve kept an eye on you

are you drunk

y/n/n

i’m not a child oscar

lanny

*lando, but i’ll ignore that

and i’m not saying you are yn

there’s just people here that can be like

weird is all, who knows

are you drunk??

y/n/n

i don’t know, i’m not sober

are you drunk

lanny

i’m not sober

y/n/n

i thought you hated alcohol?

lanny

carlos convinced me to do some shots with him and max…

i regret it a little

do you wanna go home

y/n/n

yea

my feet hurt

lanny

i’ll carry you until we get to an uber

so can you tell me where you are now??

y/n/n

i’m in the bathroom

lanny

don’t move, i’ll come get you

y/n/n

god you’re the best ever lando

lanny

yeah i know 😁

[gloxk]

just sitting here high asf thinking about getting the sloppiest head from aot guyzzz…*HEAVY ASS SIGH* let me wish upon a star hoping someone could write about this for me…*LONG HEAVY EXTREME SIGH.*

⁺ 　 . ✦ Favorite eaters ⁺ 　 . ✦

(Eren Y. Armin A. Connie S.)

A/N: ugh yes girl ik the feeling … im to sitting here wondering how nasty eren would eat the kitty…BUT ANYWAYS TYSM FOR 600!!! NEXT STOP 700!!! AHHH!

Synopsis: Aot men as your favorite eater.

━━━━━━━⚥━━━━━━━

♡ Eren ♡

Ughh omg..Eren giving you nasty head after he pissed you off…The type of head that makes you run away in shame!!!

“Givin me an attitude ain’t gonna get you anywhere, you know better den that.” Eren scoffed, while tossing a blunt over to you.

Oh boy how he was so undeniably wrong.

You could tell Eren was unamused with your bullshit. He wasn’t taking you ignoring lightly at all.

“You gon fix it or am I, figure it out.” he whispered in your ear. You stood on what you dished out, you weren’t fixing shit.

You chuckled at him in response, how stupid he was to think you were going to pipe down.

That was until he found his way between your thighs..

One hand tangled in his brown locs and the other one holding a blunt. Best combo..

You lazily rutted against his tongue while his piercing twirled against your puffy clit.

It was so hard to look him in the eyes after he made you cum on his tongue 3 times.

“Still got an attitude baby?”

Let’s just say..you ain’t had one after that.

♡ Armin ♡

Oh..lawd. I said this once i’ll say it A FUCKING AGAIN. Armin is a pussy eater expert. He’s VERY talented in that ‘field’..

This man has no problem eating it for breakfast, lunch, or dinner. Hell, he will wake up and decide he’s hungry and start going crazy.

That’s how your morning starts..with Armin stuck between your thighs eating it so you can wake up.

Eyes barely opened and you’re already on the verge of cumming..his way of saying ‘goodmorning’.

He so eager to do it too. Sometimes yall could just be watching netflix and he will insist on eating you out.

“Well, I mean, the show is kind of boring. Just come on, it will be quick.” He’ll beg and beg, “Please, I know you’re tired, I can help you go to sleep faster!”

His contact name is NyQuil in yo phone! (If you know. you know .)

When he say fast..oh baby he mean fast. That tongue can move at speeds you didn’t even know existed.

But his favorite time to get to munching is before you go to work.

“We got 10 minutes Armin.” He don’t need even need 10 he will make you cum in 5.

♡ Connie ♡

Ex! Connie getting fucking wasted and coming back home and eating you till your cummin everywhere…

I just know he eats it with his grillz on..I just know.

You want nasty head? Connie is your man for it. He gonna make it SLOPPY SLOPPY.

“Baby whatchu mean, we supposed to be in love..” his words slightly slur, he had a fuck boy grin plastered over his face. “stop acting like you ain’t happy to see me.”

He wasn’t supposed to be there and he knew that. But you couldn’t stay mad at him for long, especially when he was telling you how much he missed you. “Cmere baby i’ve been missin you..” & “I know you mad at me lemme change that.”

if ‘Let my face be yo chair’ was a person…

Sitting on his face is a pleasure to you and him. He gets to see his (ex) girlfriend and you get some head.

A win win in your books!

You grinding against his golden grills while his hands rub your waist up and down. “You got such pretty moans, lemme hear em baby.” & “Uh-huh, let it out mama.”

He’s looking you dead in your eyes while doing it too…

“You made such a mess baby. Don’t worry go to sleep, ima clean it up.” UGH THIS MAN….

best ex ever!

━━━━━━━⚥━━━━━━━

going absolute feral for these men it don’t even make any sense.

[gassydumbjocks]

Do it like a Macho

Joel finished putting on his favorite shirt to go out, and checked his chat again, he could hardly believe that he had agreed to go out with that guy his best friend had told him about, he had broken up with his ex months ago, and didn't seem to feel ready to take on another relationship, but, well, a date was better than staying depressed on his couch all afternoon eating junk food watching rom-coms.

He finished by adding his perfume, checking himself once again in the mirror, and sighing "Please dont be a jerk this time" he wished for his next date, when the bell ring got him out of trance.

He ran when he heard the doorbell, and to his great surprise, a tall boy, with a some-what tanned skin, clearly showing latino roots, beefy complexion, large muscles, showed out of his door. There was only one detail, the hunk boy was shirtless, only wearing some gym shorts, and if that wasnt enough, a slight stench was present almost immediately, making obvious it came from the big jock, Joel wrinkled his nose a little trying to be discreet.

"Ehh.. Hello, can I help you?" He asked, raising an eyebrow, the jock frowned. "Are you Joel?" He limited himself to ask.

"Yes, uh, are you the boy with whom I had a dat..." his words were interrupted as the animal of a man simply proceed and grabbed him by his head, within a second, he had his head to remain below in one of his armpits, receiving directly that aroma he lingered before, making him cough on the manly scent.

"Shut up! Faggot!" Saul said with an expression of disgust, without any effort he grabbed Joel's shirt collar while he tried to gasp for some air "I don't go to dates with sissys like you! I only hang out with my bros" he told him furiously. "This should put some hair on that chest of yours" Not having time to react quickly, the stinky hunk let out a deep, nasty burp right in his face.

BOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRPPPPP!!!

"Now lets start... Real men don't cook, that's for the ladies" the jock said as he blew the remains of his burp towards the poor, scrawny nerd.

As Joel forcibly inhaled Saul's putrid smoke, his brain began to be penetrated by the stench, new memories being created that would replace everything that made Joel him, memories of his mother teaching him how to cook and take care of himself, became in memories of his mother cooking for him, his father and brothers.

"Ugh, God... That's disgusting" Joel swallowed the burp while trying not to vomit while gagging.

"Come on man, you have to get out the machismo inside you... Real men don't clean, we are made to be crude, and ought to be grotty" Saul raised a leg and squinted an eye, before grunting.

PPPPPPPPPPRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTT!!!

After letting out a loud fart that rumbled through his shorts, with a quick maneuver Saul brought Joel closer to his butt, being greeted by the toxic smell emanating from it, Joel swore it would be enough to knock out an elephant, coughing violently.

Again, his mind felt blurred, his thoughts changing with more memories again, since he was a child, the nerdy boy had always been a clean freak, tidying his room and cooperating with his sisters to clean the whole house. now, for some reason he could only remember him and his brothers watching soccer games in their undies, dirty plates of food filling the kitchen sink, dirty clothes scattered throughout the all the house, the toilet bowl up and dirty.

"What's going on?" Joel said, now more dizzy and confused than ever, his nausea preventing him from reasoning clearly and making a superhuman effort not to smell that foul bomb.

"You're becoming a man, that's happening, you better brace your pathetic self, this is a damn combo" Saul warned, then his stomach growled fiercely, while a smirk appeared in his mouth.

"NO!" Joel pleaded, but it was too late, as his please were overshadowed by Saul bending down to be at his height, only to blurt out in his face "MAAAAN UUUUUUUPPP-UUURRRRRRP!!!!" He belched his words out, while forcing the weak gay boy to sniff the nauseating blast.

By that point Joel had already fallen to the ground, crying and suffocating, pleading that this was some kind of nightmare, Saul rolled his eyes and growled "What a fuckin baby, it's just a little man gas, what are you?! Uh? You're a guy, you should be proud... Real men always let the gas rip" he said. , before bending over again, putting his big ass in those smelly shorts scented with all those gases dangerously close to his face, to let one last fart finish his job, poor Joel just having a final view of the ass getting closer "NOOOOOO!!..."

PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTT!!!

...

"And he is right..." was the first thought that Joel had after the abrupt attack in that gas chamber "Men always let it rip... A Man loves to let it rip, its just a dude thing we have to assert our dominance" was what came out then of his lips, before Saul heard and turned to see him, and a huge smile of satisfaction formed on his face.

"Fuck yeah man, nothing like dropping a fat one with your bros for a good laugh, right? We guys should always think farts are funny, they're manly" he remarked.

And as if it was a cue, a growl in Joel's stomach began to growl and make him uncomfortable, he simply patted himself and raised his leg.

PPPPPPPPPPPPPRRRRRRRRTTTT!!!

"ahh, that felt good" he sighed and letted a dumb chuckle "i have to quit that chipotle next time" he said with a grin, and Saul hit his shoulder playfully.

"haha that's nothing bro, the burping contest we had on our boys' night was brutal, man, you can even belch out the alphabet like a maestro, eh? Show off those roars" Saul added with a huge smile.

"AHHH.. BEHHH... CEEHH.. DEEEHHH" His mind was blank now, a simple order like that was enough to control him and make the burps start to come out of him, even when he didn't feel the need to burp, he just wanted to show off with his bro... It is what real men do.

"That felt good" He said, with a stupid grin forming in his lips too.

"As it should be! You gotta take pride in your machismo, huh? Machote" He said before slapping hiss ass, causing a small but putrid fart to come out of his now plump ass, making both of them laugh. "damn yeah, bro, its fuckin great to be a man" Joel said and Saul nodded proudly.

With that putrid gas, Joel sealed his new persona, letting his old gay and scrawny being fly away in the form of that smelly fart, to become a dumber, grosser, sexist, loud, and obnoxious version of him, a real man, and a real macho.

Seconds later he got a text from his best friend, or his best bro, and read it "Broo, hurry up and bring your fuckin ass here, we gotta have a boys night and watch the game, bring the beer, haven't Saul picked you up yet?"

He smirked and responded "On our way brodah, don't nuke your room too soon, I want to breath some fresh air for the match" He joked and chuckled dumbly, as he squinted one eye and simply lifted his leg to rip a fat deep one before going out his place, fist bumping with Saul.

[yoitsjay]

😈😈😈

The way I got the grinch smile reading all your kinky! reader stuff-

Tuysrsyriseiysurddtdq35qseyud

My ahh HOWLING at the moon from all the good food you serve, chef!

Back to request the batboys (+Damian) wearing lingerie with a dom! reader.

Idk why, but seeing guys in pretty lingerie, it just- It does something to my psyche, my neurons are activated when I see that good stuff-

Also, congrats on 200 followers! Wish you more!

👏👏👏

~😈 anon

OK no more kinky stuff after this cuz I'm gunna get all kinked out- Kebdkdndj

Your lucky fuckers.

It's my favorite color

Summary: your all horny bastards and I hate you /j

Warnings: short and sweet, batboys in lingerie of your favorite color

A/n: IM ALL KINKED OUT 😭 i need angst in my holes

Bruce Wayne:

Seeing him in bed, in lingerie, that was your favourite color- it almost killed you.

You stared at Bruce, wide eyed, mouth agape as you took in his appearance, kneeling on the bed.

Then your nose started bleeding, and he started panicking.

seeing him run in this tight, lacy lingerie.

you passed out.

yeah he'd try it again another night.

Dick Grayson:

You were frantically shedding clothes off of each other, his leg wedged between your thighs as he pinned you to the wall and kissed you feverishly… you slid your hands up his shirt, and your eyebrows furrowed as you felt something lacy up on his chest.

You then slipped your hands down, past the band of his sweatpants and you moved to cup his ass, and again felt the same fabric.

You pulled your head back, pushing against his chest before you roughly tugged down his pants and gasped.

“Lingerie? Really Grayson? You thought that was gonna make me feel better after the shit you pulled on patrol yesterday-”

“I bought you a matching set-”

You pause, staring up at the tall man as you both stand awkwardly In front of each other in the hallway, panting, sweating…

“Get your ass in the bedroom Grayson. And grab my rope.”

Jason Todd:

Jason always seemed to be surprising you. From being alive again, to being a moany little bitch when pegged, to this.

Him in Lingerie, which just so happened to be your favorite color.

“Uhm- i iust- i know this is weird but-” he spoke up as you stared, watching as you silently walked over before tugging on the Lingerie bottoms, and the leather straps around his thick, muscly thighs.

You slowly moved to straddle his lap, then kissed him, softly, holding him close before you pulled back and rested your head against his.

“I want you to set up the camera and rail me Todd, wearing what you're wearing.”

Tim Drake:

It had been late, you and Tim were still at Wayne Enterprises, clocking in those overtime hours.

with some coffee in your hands, you made your way towards Tim’s office. You noticed that the blinds were closed, which you found odd, since he liked to keep them open for the most part.

You approached the door, and adjusted the cups in your hands before knocking on the door. “Timmy? You alright?” You called out to him.

“Yeah baby I'm good! Come in.” He called out to you, and so you did. Opening up the door and stepping inside, keeping your eyes on the coffee as you shut the door behind you, before glancing up at Tim, smiling, then glancing away, only to double back when your eyes clocked what he was wearing.

The coffee slipped from your Hands and clattered to the floor, spilling everywhere.

“UGH! Look what you made me do! If you're gonna dress up like a slut, then you can clean up the problem you made.” You hissed, and gestured To the floor. “On your knees and clean. After that I'll show you what I do to boys who look good in lace.”

Damian Wayne:

This is so unlike him.

Wearing female underwear, let alone your favorite color.

But you had been doing quite a lot together lately, and he accidentally stumbled upon one of your magazines, Which happened to show off men in lingerie.

You had one of the pictures circled

That was the set he bought.

Now he waited in your apartment (he may or may not have a key), and waited impatiently for you to walk in…

And on cue, you did.

“Dami?” you called out, already knowing damn well he was in your apartment. You had that tingly feeling every time he was around you.

Then you spotted him in the living room and you screamed.

From shock, and- yeah no, just shock.

Your boyfriend was wearing lingerie from a catalog and the set was so specific you knew he had read your magazine.

“I told you not to snoop through my things Dami! I mean holy shit- your smoking, this looks really good on you and you definitely deserve a BJ, but privacy!” You squeaked out, dropping your things and making your way over to him.

“It's not even my birthday yet-” you muttered.

Tag list:

All: @only-my-unexistent-fiances @francesfarhadi

Batfam:

BW smut: @ilaiise

DG smut: @ilaiise

JT smut: @ilaiise

TD smut: @ilaiise

DW smut:

[anothermansjeans]

youtuber!reader does the orange peel trend with spencer

YESSSSS (he would excel)

cw: food mention, fluff fluff FLUFF, spencer is the standard for ALL MEN

wc: 351

youtuber!reader masterlist

++

You set up your phone behind your water bottle, camera facing front as Spencer was in front of you doing dishes. There had been a trend on TikTok and you wanted to see how Spencer would react. Watching the way some people’s boyfriends reacted to the “orange peel trend” was actually horrific. Some men just didn't get it. You had faith in Spencer though, and you'd quickly be proven right.

“Hey, Spence?”

“Yes?” He placed the last plate into the dishwasher before starting it up and leaning back against the sink.

“I’m craving fruit.”

“What kind?” His response was automatic, which caused you to smile, and with his words, he walked over to the fruit bowl on your opposite counter.

“An orange?” He gave a nod and grabbed the biggest one before walking over to you. “I actually don’t– wait what?” You watched as he pressed his thumb into the orange, peeling back the skin unprompted– unasked. “Spencer, no!”

He stopped in his tracks and looked up to your pouting face, “what? What happened? Did I do something wrong?”

“Yes! I mean, no, you didn't, ugh!” You turned your body in your high top chair to face the side he was walking towards, and reached over to grab his wrists (which were still holding the orange), pulling him between your legs. “I was supposed to give you hints that I didn't want to peel the orange so TikTok could see how long it would take.”

“But you never want to peel your oranges.” His brows were furrowed, and he had a point. He knows you better than you know yourself at this point.

Sighing again, you slumped your body forward, leaning your head against his chest, “you're right. You're always right, and I love you for it.”

You felt his chest reverberate with his laugh, and he kissed the top of your head. “Do you still want this orange?”

Sliding your head up, your chin was now resting on his chest. “Yes, please.” You both smiled at each other before sharing a kiss, and Spencer finished the peeling of your orange.

++

BONUS: some comments

@ user: THIS WAS SO CUTE WHAT

@ user1: WTF HE DIDNT EVEN NEED TO BE ASKED IM OVER IT

@ user2: how does it feel to win at life?

@ user3: spencer being the best boyfriend to ever exist… did you build him in a lab??

@ user4: you're living the life the one girl who’s boyfriend said “tough luck, buddy” to wishes she has 😭

@ user5: THAT SHOULD BE ME

@ user6: spencer passing the orange peel theory is the only thing that makes sense to me in life tbh

@ user7: this proves that if he wanted to, HE WOULD

++

youtuber!reader taglist: @im-a-ghost666 @lyd14k4y @happiestcat @hauntedtv13 @obi-wansgirl @charismatic-writer @navs-bhat

let me know if you would like to be added or removed!

[mncxbe]

Imagine walking in on BSD men masturbating...

Or the other way around oh my lord

nonnie😳😳 i'm having so many thoughts about this.

𝐂𝐡𝐮𝐮𝐲𝐚 would be just a tiny bit flustered, but he'd take full advantage of the situation. I mean, your hand feels better than his anyway

"Come on, princess don't just stand there. Give me a hand, will you? Good girl, I'll make sure to return the favour"

𝐃𝐚𝐳𝐚𝐢 would pretend not to notice you're there and keep stroking his dick. but he'd moan your name louder just to get you riled up. he wants you to know how much he wishes it were your snug walls wrapped around him instead of his hand.

"Shit– Y/N... miss you so much baby ugh need you so bad"

𝐀𝐤𝐮𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐰𝐚- SHY BOY OMG. he'd cover himself up with the closest blanket or cloth and yell at you to get out. but if you tease him any further about it he will drag you to bed and put you back in your place

"Think you're so smart to make fun of me like that? Fuuck Y/N– look who's dumb on my cock now, dirty girl. You're squeezing me so much"

𝐍𝐢𝐤𝐨𝐥𝐚𝐢 would be so damn shameless. if anything he'd be amused and happy that you walked in on him. 100% sure he asks you to masturbate with him

"Oh, my dove, you came just at the right time. I was just thinking about you... will you strip for me, please? I wanna see that pretty body of yours."

𝐅𝐮𝐤𝐮𝐳𝐚𝐰𝐚's reaction depends on how close you are. if you're in a relationship he'd ask you to join him, but if you're just colleagues he'd blush. like. crazy. and fumble with his clothes. but after that he'd pretend nothing happened and hope you forget about it.

[aloysiavirgata]

Will you write me a post-Fight Club fic? They’re bruised and beat up and I want to read about it.

Kersh had said Sweet fancy Moses when he saw their injuries and ordered them either home or desk bound until such time as they would not terrify small children with their countenances.

***

Scully slouched against the wall with an ice pack on her face. She did not want to be here, but she didn’t want to be anywhere else either. People stared and she hated it more than she hated paperwork. She had practically worn a groove in her apartment floor from caged pacing.

Mulder was using a tape dispenser to grind Excedrin tablets into a powder. He rubbed it on the insides of his swollen lips like cocaine.

“Ow,” he observed. He didn’t get the fun medications until he went home, which he didn’t wish to do because it was boring. He carried his injuries with a certain swagger.

“I thought Mr. Saperstein was going to show you some in-your-face, smack-down moves so you could quit getting your ass kicked so often,” Scully said.

Mulder scowled at her. He grabbed a pad of paper from the desk and wrote YOU’RE LOOKING PRETTY ROUGH YOURSELF XENA. He tapped at it until she looked up.

“The Lorax is coming for you, Mulder,” she warned.

He was finding it difficult to talk clearly with a wired jaw but, because he found it impossible to refrain from making smart remarks, he was on his third legal pad.

WELL EXCUSE ME BUT I WASN’T EXPECTING TO HAVE TO EITHER TAKE A CANE TO THE JAW OR PUNCH AN OLD LADY

He added a frowny face and several exclamation points to emphasize the complexity of the situation.

Scully examined her reflection in the back of a spoon. Either Lulu or Betty - Scully couldn’t remember which thanks to the concussion - had launched herself off the ropes and onto Scully. She had led with her forehead.

“Burt Zupanic,” she mused, readjusting the ice. “Of all the men to fight over.”

SWEET-ASS PERM, Mulder noted, unhelpfully.

She laughed, which hurt. Most things hurt at present, her pride included. She’d already had three cups of coffee this morning, but after surviving all her various maimings, Scully was confident her organs could handle it. She emptied the pot into her Stanford mug.

Mulder tapped her arm. HEY I AM ORDERING SOME CLAM CHOWDER FOR LUNCH. DO YOU WANT ANYTHING?

“Clam chowder through a straw, ugh, Mulder. Besides, you’re not supposed to have anything with chunks in it.”

THEY ARE BLENDING IT UP FOR ME. MILKSHAKE OF THE SEA.

She gagged a little. “That’s vile.”

PROBABLY. IF THEY MAKE ANOTHER MOVIE ABOUT US I THINK WE SHOULD NOT MENTION THIS PARTICULAR INCIDENT.

As though he actual movie had been so much better. She cringed every time she thought about it. At least the COPS episode conveyed her reluctance and irritation. “Pinky swear.”

He held his own finger out and she hooked hers around it.

THE PACT IS SEALED

“Hey Mulder?”

“Hmmm?”

“Do you want to get the hell out of here, go take some of the really good painkillers, curl up in my bed in our underwear, and watch bad Lifetime movies until we pass out? I don’t have chowder but there’s leftover tomato bisque with your name on it.”

FUCK THE CHOWDER LET’S ROLL

They were out the door before the ink dried.

[jamiliana]

random drabble cs i was bored :33 req open btw!

💫 warning 💫

♡ BLACK MALE.

♡ abuse; gojo slaps u like once out of built up anger.

♡ MENTIONS OF MASTERBATION reader),, ALSO MENTIONS OF READER FUCKING OTHER PPL..(MEN AND WOMEN)

♡︎ signs of depression,,

♡︎ unhealthy lifestyle for like a bit.

♡︎ reader is so oblivious 😔..

this is rlly short

♡ SORRY FOR THE HUGE AMOUNTS OF SPACES. i types ts on docs so its gonna do that

♡ no uppercase :3

♡ no nsfw

random song u can listen to for this ig (no it doesnt go along with this drabble (i think)):

geto suguru. when that name comes to mind, you bite your soft, light pink bottom lip- a beautiful contrast to your brown upper lip- and your knees swayed with weakness. geto suguru.. the man he was.. it almost disgusted you with how beautiful he was. almost.

those beautiful deep-violet eyes- the same color as the dark night sky as your eyes burn from how long you’ve been staring at the blinding light of your phone screen- pulling an all nighter of course. those eyes.. always crinkling as he smiles, the faint yet visible dimple on his pale skin winking at you. but it was never you, was it? always gojo. gojo this, gojo that. it made you sick. but you knew better than to express your hatred for gojo. after all.. he was quite attractive to you too. you don’t know at this point- every time you thought of satoru, you’d do the same thing you did when you thought of suguru- bite your lip and sway your knees as they weakened. but then you’d remember how sickeningly close him and suguru were and you’d feel the same feeling you felt now- jealousy.

ugh, jealousy. you hated it. you hate how jealous you were of both of the men. they had each other and you wish you had both of them. but that’d never happen. you knew all too well. even shoko- the other person that made them a trio looked left out at times.

you didn’t stand a chance. you didn’t.

but oh, you wish you did. it hurts so bad.

you suck in a bit of air and click the off button on the side of your phone.

it hurts..

the phone gets placed on your night stand as you shakily stand up from your bed.

what time was it? it felt like it has been so long since you’ve taken a shower today.

what month was it? january.. or was it july? what day was it? tuesday.. thursday?

tears spilled from your eyes- almost mocking you as you stared into the thing you’ve been avoiding since that day. that day where reality crashed down onto you.

your reflection.

God, it was disgusting.

your hair wasn’t dirty- thank God- but you have been forgetting to wear your bonnet. so your thick, curly type 4 hair was all over the place.

damn, you needed to set up a hair appointment.

but, gosh, it wasn’t only your hair.

the dark purple and horrid black under your eyes was a consequence of all the nights you’ve been awake. they weren’t the slight black under suguru’s eyes that he had from the make up he wore- oh God no. they were disgusting to look at. you swore you almost threw up.

your eyes looked so.. empty but you couldn’t bare to stare into them for any longer than a split second.

your beautiful brown skin wasn’t glowing like it always did. you’ve been forgetting to moisturize yourself after taking showers. along with the dried tears..

you were..

a mess.

yes, perfect wording.

a mess.

and all because of that day.

the day reality crashed.

the day gojo and geto kissed.

shoko clapped happily for them while you just blinked.

‘oh.’

you remember thinking.

‘of course. they are practically meant for eachother. why would i ever have a chance?’

you remember thinking.

after that day- May 25th- it was a saturday, you remember. you, shoko, geto, and gojo were at a café, deciding it would be a great way to hang out especially since school wasn’t in session.

you regret going.

you wish you never went.

but now, as you stare into your reflection, you say something aloud- to yourself of course.

“fuck them.”

‘fuck them’ indeed.

you chuckle, thanking the cashier and strutting your way out of the convenience store.

life has been great.

you’ve been getting healthier- not as healthy as you used to be- but still good nonetheless; drinking more water, getting back into your regular training, eating more fruits and vegetables, being active again.

a godly contrast to how you were a month ago.

things were better now.

sure, you still liked suguru and satoru.

and you hated that you did.

but you learned to accept it and move on. love doesn’t just leave so simply.

you have also learned to distance yourself from them.

you learned to just.. live. breeze through your days til your inevitable demise (which you knew was soon to come- especially as a sorcerer.)

though at least you breezed through them without any issue-

a hard chest stopped you from moving forward to your school along with a pair of rather big, strong hands gripping your shoulders from behind halting you to a stop.

“so this is where you’ve been, baby?”

baby?

“satoru?- wait,,”

with wobbly knees you attempted to turn around to at least look at the owner of the strong hands gripping your shoulders but a familiar soft voice filled your eardrums.

“stop trying to turn around, baby.”

again, with the baby stuff.. why were they being all love-y for? like how they used to be.

as friends, of course. they never liked you like that.

“suguru?! hah..”

why were they here? you made sure you wouldn’t ever run into them anymore.

so how..

you heard a chuckle- which you knew was from suguru because of how soft the chuckle was and because satoru- who was in front of you- had his soft, pink lips in a tight, firm, thin line.

”yes, baby boy, suguru,,~ it’s been a while.”

you weren’t even focused on how he called you baby boy,, after all, they always used to call you pet names.

‘which could mean nothing.’ you’d always say to yourself whenever satoru or suguru called you ‘baby’, ‘baby boy’, ‘prince’, etc.

you were more so focused on that word,, while.

a while is an understatement. it’s been a month and a few weeks since you’ve last talked to them or even glanced in their direction.

but oh, how you missed the soft, gentle, and kind voice of suguru and the obnoxious, loud, dee voice of satoru’s.

oh, how you missed the deep violet and the obnoxiously bright, blue eyes to contrast looking at you with such love care in their eyes,,

oh, how you missed the weird bangs and the man bun atop suguru’s head and the fluff of white atop satoru’s head that they’d always let you play with- espcially suguru,,

and the height difference. you missed how gojo and geto looked down at you as you talked excitedly about something while they smiled and muttered a few responses back- looking mesmerized at.. something. but it could never be you. right?

ugh.

fuck, you needed them so badly. you were tired of stuffing your fingers up your swollen cunt and pretending it was suguru’s or satoru’s. you were tired of fucking other women and men and pretending they were satoru and suguru.

you were tired.

“well? don’t you have something to say to us, (name)?” gojo said after only a few seconds of silence.

fuck. that teasing voice,, always made heat form in between your plump thighs.

“no? why should i say anything,,” you muttered in response, fumbling with the hem of the biker shorters you had decided to wear.

bad choice, really. but a majority of your wardrobe was biker shorts, Nikes, crocs, uggs, hoodies, simple multicolored tees, and Nike socks.

the other minority was just black and gray leggings and sweatpants that you barely wore unless it was cold.

you heard geto click his tongue.

“seriously, baby boy? when you started avoiding us, did you lose some brain cells too?” suguru spoke up.

you were just glad gojo didn’t. the man looked pissed. hell, his usually pale face was slightly a little red with a frown etched on his features.

‘thank God i’m black.. i could never..’

oh, right. you had to respond to geto.

“ah- what do you mean,, i haven’t been avoi-“

you were cut off by a harsh slap to your cheek.

ow.

it hurt so bad.

it hurt..

huh. funny. you remember feeling hurt.

“gojo!” suguru scolded, forcefully spinning you around and rubbing your cheek affectionately- concern etched all over his pretty, pale face,,

it felt so good…

you suppressed a whimper as you felt the familiar heat in between your legs that you once felt for suguru.

“sorry, suguru. but he- he’s lying. does he even know how much hurt we felt when he started avoiding us? he deserves it.”

what?

you forced yourself to turn back around to face gojo.

“huh- gojo-“

“satoru.”

oh,,?

“satoru.. i only avoided you guys because i didn’t want to ruin your relationship..”

silence.

after a few minutes of gojo breathing heavily while staring at you, suguru lifted you up with ease- snatching the case of cookies you had just brought and handing them to satoru.

what the fuck?

the sound of two muttered voices above your head is what awoke you.

“he looks so pretty, satoru..”

“i know. i can’t believe he’d ignore us for something so idiotic. does he not realize the way we look at him?”

what?

“what..?” you mumbled, slowly sitting up, putting your hands on the hard chest’s of whoever two people were on each of your sides to prop yourself up.

this was gonna be a long day.

[black-aurora-nora]

Sibling Squabbles | Yandere!Superman and Jon x Teen!Reader

“Jon, please get out the way.” You demanded in an even tone.

The younger boy didn’t budge from his spot in front of the door. His gaze held firm and he shook his head, “Dad said you couldn’t leave.”

“Clark doesn’t hold authority over me.” You reminded him matter of factly, “He’s not my father and I’m not your sister.”

Jon frowned deeply at your words, “Dad said you’d have a hard time-“

“Move, Jon!” You demanded again, louder.

You moved up to him, trying to shuffle past him with your backpack filled with a few essentials.

“Where would you even go?! You were homeless before this!”

“And? At least I wasn’t stuck in some house with creepy men!” You rebutted angrily, grabbing for the doorknob.

Jon grabbed your wrist, gripping it tight, “I’m not creepy! And neither is my dad! Take that back!” He knew that his dad told him to be gentle with you since you were still settling down but you were going too far.

“No! I mean it! You’re creepy!” You repeated sharply, trying to wrestle your wrist from Jon’s grip. “Ugh! It’s no wonder your mom left-!”

A sickening crack sounded from your wrist and you saw it crinkle in a way it wasn’t supposed to then a horrible pain that left you screaming from both the shock of what happened and the pain.

Jon stood frozen, breathing uneven.

He looked from your crumpled arm to your snotty face.

He hadn’t meant to hurt you. His father had warned him plenty of times to use his powers for good and here he was hurting you because you said something hurtful.

“I-I’m- (Y/N), I’m so-!” He reached out to you and you jerked back violently with a yelp.

“Stay the fuck away from me!” You snapped, opening the door with your good hand and running out towards the trail that led to the city.

Jon decided it best that he not follow you.

He knew you wouldn’t escape now anyhow. You were far too hurt and in too much shock to get far enough. And no one would allow a young teen like you to walk around with a broken arm if you did make it to the city.

The next time he saw you, which was a day later, his father had brought you back home with a blue cast on your arm.

You looked exhausted, pissed off, and every other negative emotion that people could feel.

Clark had you both in the living room and glanced at the two of you sternly. He looked at you first with an expectant gaze.

“(Y/N), apologize to your brother.” He said, arms crossed.

You kept your gaze on the cast for a moment.

A deep breath in, “Sorry.”

“You can do better than that.” Clark wasn’t one that took apologies lightly. You had to put your full heart into it. “Remember what we talked about at the doctor’s.”

Another deep breath, “Sorry for saying stuff about your mother.” You gritted out, “And about you… I didn’t mean it.” Your voice was incredibly monotone but Clark knew that was the best they were going to get from you right now.

He knew there’d be plenty more altercations in the future to teach you how to apologize properly and honestly.

He turned to Jon, “Be more careful in the future,” He reminded him simply, “And apologize to your sister.”

Jon’s lip wobbled as he gazed at you and you wished great harm upon him. How dare he act like he was the one that had been victimized? Like he was innocent?

How dare Clark make you apologize first when Jon had hurt you? Now you were stuck in a cast and had been set back.

“I’m sorry, (Y/N). I won’t do that ever again and I forgive you.” He gave you a teary smile, “I know you’re having a hard time and I should’ve kept my anger in check.”

Clark smiled warmly, “Try to keep the sibling squabble to a minimum, okay, you two?” He patted you both on the head.

He then stood up and made his way to the kitchen, “Who wants breakfast?” He asked, tying an apron around his person, “I’m thinking waffles, eggs and bacon!”

Jon licked his lips, “I’ll have some! Can I help?!” He asked excitedly, running after his father.

“Of course you can, Jon.” You heard Clark answer from the kitchen, “(Y/N), come join us.”

God you hated them with every fiber of your being.

[justagalwhowrites]

The Savage and the Sanctuary - Ch. 5: Fracture

You and Joel try to find a balance in your relationship in Los Angeles. A continuation of The Savage and the Sanctuary, a no outbreak TLOU story, from the prologue through chapter 4 found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

CW: Very mild violence. Masturbation. Description of porn. No use of Y/N. Whole fic will be explicit so minors DNI, 18+ only.

Length: 14.3k (IDFK what my problem is)

Fic Masterlist | Masterlist | AO3 | Prologue | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

“Hey, Big Miller!” Tanya yelled toward her living room, wine glass clutched precariously in her grasp.

“Shhh!” You clamped your hand over Tanya’s mouth as she practically cackled. “Will you cool it?” 

She shoved you away playfully. 

“We need a camera man,” she said. “And I don’t think he’s busy.” 

“Can’t we ask one of your security guards?” You asked, brows raised. “Because I don’t think they’re busy, either.” 

“Yes but my security guards aren’t eye candy,” she replied, almost smug. “And they’re in the guard shack. So the obvious choice is… Oh, hello Big Miller.” 

Tanya winked at you and you turned to find a surly Joel standing in her massive kitchen, his arms crossed and a fed up look on his face. 

“Can I help you.” 

“Yes, actually,” she practically flounced over to him. “We are making a TikTok…” 

“No,” Joel said. 

“Oh, come on,” she waved him off. “You’re no fun!” 

“Ain’t paid to be fun,” Joel said. “Now if you two aren’t running off somewhere crazy, think I’ll get back to…” 

“We just need a camera man,” Tanya said, putting a hand in the middle of his back and guiding him further into her kitchen. “All you have to do is press record, hold the phone and press stop.” 

Joel looked to you like he was asking for an out and, given the new, strangely kind balance to your relationship, you wished you could give him one. 

But… you did need a camera man. 

“Ellie wanted us to make a video,” you said and Joel sighed and held out his hand for Tanya’s phone, just like you knew he would as soon as you mentioned your niece. 

Tanya squealed and clapped for a moment before walking him through what she wanted him to do. 

“Alright,” he sighed as Tanya took her place next to you. “Let’s get this over with.” 

Joel was a surprisingly good sport about the whole thing, stopping and starting the recording again and again as you and Tanya swapped places and did ridiculous looking dances and you couldn’t help but laugh when you were supposed to be standing still as your friend did her part. 

“Thank you, Big Miller,” Tanya said, taking the phone back when the two of you couldn’t think of any other stupid dances to do. “We appreciate your contribution to our art.” 

“Something tells me that isn’t going to win either of y’all one of those fancy trophies,” he said before looking to you. “Should leave soon. You’ve got early shit tomorrow.” 

“So bossy,” Tanya winked at him. Joel rolled his eyes. 

“Yeah, he’s like that,” you smiled at him a little. “But we have to let him control what he can otherwise he gets grumpy.” 

“Well I guess we do have to let the men be men occasionally,” she smiled at him again before looking to you. “Do I get to see you again this trip or no?” 

“Probably not,” you said, scrunching your nose at that. “I’ve got more chemistry reads tomorrow morning, Kimmel in the afternoon, meetings in the evening, premiere the next day, flying home the day after that.” 

“Ugh, home in Texas,” she made a face. “LA is way better.” 

“I’m sorry, which of us has been on tour for the better part of a year?” You teased. “Not like you’re here for me to hang out with anyway.” 

“Hey, we’re not talking about me, we’re talking about you,” she elbowed you lightly and you laughed before you both sighed. “I’m going to miss you.” 

“I’ll miss you, too,” you smiled a little. “You can always come visit in Texas, you know.” 

“Might take you up on that,” she smiled back.

Tanya loaded you down with two dozen cookies before you left and you couldn’t help but smile a little as Joel drove the two of you back to your house. 

“Thank you,” you said, looking over at him in the glow of the street lights. “For the TikTok thing, I mean.” 

“Not the end of the world,” Joel shrugged. “Don’t understand it for shit but…” 

You smiled a little and opened the cookie tin, holding it out to Joel, who glanced at it as he drove. 

“C’mon,” you shook the tin at him, making the cookies inside rattle. “You know you want one.” 

“Can’t believe you just go over to some pop star’s house to bake cookies,” he muttered, reaching over and grabbing one, taking a bite and chewing for a moment. “And they’re fuckin’ good, too, that’s even worse…” 

You just smirked, closing the tin with a satisfying snap, looking out the window as Joel drove you home. 

It had been a strange few days since the lunch with Henry. You’d been busy - which you had expected, cramming weeks worth of meetings and outings into just a few days - and Joel had been a surprisingly comfortable companion for the whole of it. 

He sat there, watching stoically from the corner as you read lines with the actors vying to be the romantic lead in Savage Starlight. He didn’t complain about the swarms of paparazzi and fans when you went to do interviews. He even kept whatever complaints he had to himself when you went for a fitting for your dress for the premiere and your stylist, Frank, dragged him in to get feedback from a man on the fit of your bodice. 

“What was your name again, I’m sorry,” Frank asked as he stood there with his hands on your sides. 

He sighed. 

“Joel.” 

“Joel,” Frank said. “Right. Well, Joel, since I’m pretty sure you’re straight given -“ he gestured toward Joel as a whole “- that, what do you think? Should we have it sit here…” 

“Frank,” you said, half pleading, half knowing it was a lost cause. “Please leave him out of this…” 

“Honey, if you won’t listen to me, listen to him,” he said, adjusting the bodice and turning his attention back to Joel. “Do you want to fuck her more with it here?” 

He adjusted it again, making it so your breasts were higher, more ample. You sighed. 

“Or here?” He said, looking at Joel. “Be honest.” 

Joel’s eyes darted to you, wide and almost afraid. 

“I… uh…” 

“He doesn’t want to fuck me at all, Frank,” you said, rolling your eyes, your hands on your hips. 

He rolled his back.

“Please, everyone wants to fuck you.” 

“You don’t.” 

“Yeah, that’s because I want to fuck him,” he jerked his head toward Joel.

“Oh, well, I’ll be sure to tell Bill that,” you teased, barely holding back a smirk. “Tell him you’re out here…” 

“Don’t you dare.” 

“…checking out bodyguards…” 

“Please don’t.” 

“…causing problems…” 

“Do you really think that paranoid old man could cope if he knew I was hanging out with that walking wet dream?” Frank asked, brows raised. “Please. For both our sakes, save me the fight and keep it to yourself and you,” he rounded on Joel. “Tell her the truth, that you want to fuck her more when the girls are higher.” 

“Can you promise me I won’t have a nip slip on the red carpet if you shove my boobs up to the sky?” You said before Joel had a chance to stumble his way through another response. “Because Quinn might kill me if I do.”

“Do you really think I’d let that happen?” He asked, brows raised. “If it makes you feel better, we’ll put some pasties on the girls, that way if your tits find some way to defy the laws of physics - which, if anyone’s could, it’s yours - you’re not really flashing the whole world.” 

“Very considerate,” you said wryly, ignoring the roll of his eyes. “Then sure, put my tits under my chin if that will bring you joy.” 

“You’re my favorite client for a reason,” he said, going about pinning the dress into place and you bit back a smile as Joel stood there, his hands in his pockets as he stared determinedly off to the side his eyes darting back your way every half minute or so. 

Joel had even been a pleasant presence at home. You’d FaceTimed Ellie the night before while you sat at your kitchen island with a glass of wine, just nodding along and listening to her talk about her day, trying not to dwell too much on the little mannerisms she had that reminded you of Anna. Joel came in - you weren’t sure why, his hand running absently over the granite counter before rapping his knuckles on it and Ellie spotted him then, perking up even more when she did. 

“Hey, Big Miller!” She called in a sing-songy voice. 

Joel came up behind you, tall and broad at your back, leaning down to get in the frame of the camera of your iPad. 

“Hey Trouble,” he said, teasing Ellie with her own code name. “Been keeping your nose clean for your grandmother? Behaving for Seth?” 

“No,” she smirked. “But remember that one debate I had coming up?” 

“I do.” 

“Well, I did it,” she said proudly, sitting up a little straighter. “And I won.” 

“You did?” He asked, pride in his voice. Ellie nodded eagerly. “Knew you could, that smart mouth of yours.” 

“I kicked his ass,” she said happily. 

“Was it that one kid?” Joel asked. “The asshole?”

“Yup,” Ellie beamed. “And I made him look like a fucking idiot.” 

“Ellie!” You scolded. 

“Sorry, Sissy,” she rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to Joel. “Freaking idiot.”

Joel snorted. 

“Good for you, kiddo,” he said. “Knew you could do it.” 

Once you finished up the call with Ellie, you went and found Joel. He’d taken to spending time by the pool since the night he’d found you there. Sometimes he had a book, sometimes he just watched the water, his hands folded between his knees looking like he was lost in thought. He was there then, too, watching the water this time with a bottle of beer at his feet. 

“Hey,” you said, knowing better than to approach him silently. 

He looked back over his shoulder to you. 

“Hey,” he said before looking back at the water. 

You came and sat next to him, watching the light ripple in silence for a moment. 

“Think Ellie misses you,” you said, glancing to him as you did. He just grunted. “It sounds like she talks with you…” 

“We got time when I take her to school,” Joel said, almost defensively. 

“I know,” you said quickly, gently. “I just… I appreciate it. You being nice to her, I mean.” 

“Oh,” he said. 

“She needs that,” you continued. “Her dad was never in her life, it was always just her mom, Elise and me and now… She needs as many people as she can to care about her. She’s been through a lot. I’m glad she has someone else she can talk to like that.” 

“She’s a good kid,” Joel said, staring at the water. “Don’t mind.” 

You nodded silently. 

“Puns are awful though,” he said after a moment, smiling ever so slightly. 

You laughed. 

“God, they really are,” you said. “She has a book of them.”

He looked at you then. 

“Who the hell’s idea was that?” He asked. 

You laughed again. 

“She picked it up at school a few years ago, one of those book fair things. I think she memorized it.” 

“Jesus,” Joel laughed and then sighed. “Guess we’ll never be free of ‘em.” 

“No,” you smiled a little. “Guess we won’t.” 

It had become a strange balance. Not quite friends, not quite… whatever you’d been before. Some odd middle ground where you cared what he thought and found a disorienting comfort in his presence without the kindness of any affection. 

Your phone lit up, a link from Tanya. You followed it and watched the video on TikTok, posted for not even five minutes and already thousands of likes. You smiled at it, the look on your own face as you tried not to laugh at your friend’s ridiculous dance moves and your own clumsy, erratic movements when it was your turn funnier than you’d realized. 

“That the video?” Joel asked as you sat at a red light. 

“Yeah,” you said, holding the phone out to him just as it looped. He watched for a moment, an almost serious expression on his face before it seemed like he was biting back a smile, shaking his head a little. You laughed. “You liked it!” 

“I don’t really get it,” he said, giving you a look before the light turned green and he started driving again. “But… yeah, alright, it was kinda funny. Didn’t think you celebrities really did that kind of shit, though.” 

“Why not?” You asked, going to repost the video on your own feed and texting Quinn to tell her that you had so she wasn’t caught off guard by it. 

“Dunno,” he shrugged. “Just… seems like it’s beneath you.” 

You frowned a little. 

“You do realize we’re just people, right?” You said. “We just happen to do jobs that make us famous.” 

“I know,” Joel said. “Still. Feels weird.” 

You laughed a little at that. Yeah, fame was weird. 

“Ellie seen the video yet?” He asked, glancing your way quickly. 

“She’d better be in bed,” you said. “It’s almost 2 a.m. in Texas. But I’ll send it to her in the morning.” 

“She do one, too?” Joel asked. 

“She did,” you said, smiling a little and going to Ellie’s TikTok - which you’d insisted be locked down to hell and back so paparazzi couldn’t take advantage of it - and pulling up the video. Joel parked in your driveway and you handed him your phone, pressing play for him and watched as he smiled a little as Ellie and her friend Dina did different crazy dances in a classroom at school to the same song you had. 

“Looks like she’s makin’ friends,” Joel said, giving you back your phone. He didn’t wait for a response, getting out of the car. You sat and waited patiently for him to come to your side of the car - a safety protocol that felt excessive but you went with it - before getting out yourself. “That’s good. Can be hard for kids that age now, especially at a new school.” 

“Yeah,” you said, frowning slightly at him and biting your tongue. How would he know about kids that age? You weren’t sure of his exact age but you were pretty sure he was a few years older than you and it’s not like he had kids. 

“Driver’ll be here early,” he said once you were both safely inside and you set the cookies down in the kitchen. “Any itinerary changes I should know about?” 

“Nope,” you said. “Just going to be a busy day for me with a lot of sitting around for you. Might want to bring your book.” 

“Be sure to keep myself entertained,” he said wryly, opening the tin and getting out another cookie.

You smiled. 

“Goodnight, Big Miller.” 

“Night, Siren.” 

You brought a bag with you the next day. 

You’d done enough shit like this in your time - days where you had to run from place to place at almost breakneck speed, places where you knew you’d be photographed to hell and back and others where you had some semblance of privacy and you knew you’d be desperate for some comfort - that you knew how to plan for it. 

Joel sat up front with the driver, leaving you in the back seat alone and you sent the TikTok to Ellie, telling her you hoped she had a good day at school and that you were excited to see her in a few days. You took a few minutes to review the lines you were working with that day, making sure you were comfortable with the ones you’d be reading with the kids. You always remembered your first line readings with grown ups once you were actually old enough to fully understand what was going on, how some made you feel at ease and some made your stomach churn and skin crawl. You always wanted to be the comfortable person for these kids. You hadn’t worked with many children in adulthood but it always felt strange when you did, some twinge in you that made it seem like you were watching your younger self but not able to stop what was coming.

“Doomed by the narrative,” you muttered to yourself, skimming the lines of the girl who would play your childhood self.  

“Hm?” Joel said back over his shoulder. 

“Nothing,” you said, locking the iPad as the car pulled up to the studio gate. “Just running lines.” 

There were four kids you were reading with but one that you’d been told was the favorite and she was reading last. 

All the kids were talented, you’d give them that. Of course, they had to be to make it this far. They were all 10 to 12 years old, all excited to be there, all somewhat accustomed to this life already. But you posed for pictures with them anyway - the photos going on their agents’ phones so they couldn’t post them before they were allowed to - and performed your lines in all the different ways the casting director asked. 

Eventually, the last girl came in, a sense of nervous, almost frantic energy pouring off of her, something that seemed so far away but so familiar from your childhood. 

“Can I see her resume?” You asked the casting director quietly as the production assistant went over things with the girl. 

“Sure,” she said, rifling through a small pile before handing it over. You reviewed it quickly and found what you expected - some commercial work, a three episode arc on a sitcom, no film. She was just 12 years old and new to this. You slid the resume back and went over to the girl who, you had to admit, looked a lot like you.

She was staring at you, her eyes a little wide and you tried not to laugh. Instead, you smiled and held out your hand, introducing yourself. 

“Yeah,” she said, a little awed. “I know.” 

“Thought you might,” you smiled a little wider. “What’s your name?” 

“Catherine,” she said. “Catherine Ford.” 

“It’s nice to meet you Catherine,” you said. “Want to run some lines with me, see how we do?” 

She nodded quickly and you showed her where to stand in front of the camera that was capturing your line reads for the director to watch later. 

“Let’s go from from the top,” the casting director said, giving you a nod. “Get us started.” 

You just nodded and found the character quickly, falling into her headspace, making your eyes meet the girl who was yourself. 

“Who are you?” You asked, a panicky edge to your voice. 

“Don’t you know?” She asked in response, cocking her head slightly to match your own. “I’m you.” 

“No,” you shook your head. “No, that’s not possible, you’re not real, you…” 

“I am,” she said, all calm and wise. “I’m you and I know that you… I… crud…” 

Her face scrunched and she looked down to the paper in her hands. 

“Keep going,” the casting director said to you. “Lead her in.” 

You nodded, taking a moment to reset and looking at Catherine.

“That’s not possible,” you said again. “You’re not real, you…” 

“Don’t you know?” She said and then her face fell. “Crap, I’m sorry!” 

“It’s OK,” you smiled gently. “Want to go again?” 

“Is that OK?” She asked. You just nodded and she sighed. “OK, cool. I’ll get it this time!” 

“From ‘that’s not possible,’ please,” the casting director said and you obeyed, but Catherine missed her cue to cut in that time, freezing in the moment and then looking like she was about to cry. 

“I’m sorry,” she said quickly. “I promise, I know my lines, I was up so late practicing, I won’t mess up like this if you actually cast me, I…” 

The casting director got up but you held out a hand, keeping her where she was. 

“Catherine?” You cut her off before she had a full blown panic attack. “It’s OK. Did you warm up before you came in today?” 

“No,” she sniffled a little. “No, I should have, and…” 

“Hey, I’m not criticizing you,” you smiled gently. “Even if you had, it’s probably been long enough since you left your house that it wouldn’t make a difference now anyway. Why don’t we take a minute, warm up, then try again. Sound good?” 

“Yeah,” she nodded. “Yeah, that would be great.” 

“OK,” you said. “Any warm ups you really like?” 

“Um,” she thought for a second. “To sit in solemn silence? Do you know that one?” 

You smiled a little wider. 

“Good pick,” you said. “One of my favorites. Want to start or do you want me to?” 

“Can you?” She asked. “I never have to…” 

“Of course,” you said, taking a deep breath. “Ready? To sit in solemn silence on a dull, dark dock…” 

You did a few warm ups with her, helping her loosen up and get relaxed before you got set to go again, tension coming back into her small shoulders as she got set for the next try. 

“Hey,” you said gently. Her eyes met yours. “It’s OK. Just you and me, two actors doing our thing, OK?” 

She smiled a little at that. 

“OK.” 

She seemed to take that to heart, hitting every word that time, the two of you falling into that rare space where you felt truly connected, that you were inhabiting these characters, building tension, pulling these feelings from each other and laying them bare. It was a space that was hard to find, you couldn’t do it with every actor, and this 12-year-old girl had managed it. 

The room was silent for a moment when the scene wrapped but then the casting director clapped, you and Catherine both turning to look at her, Catherine beaming. 

“Beautiful,” she said. “That was great, really really great.” 

The two of you did a few other scenes, Catherine finding her groove more and more each time and you couldn’t help but marvel at her talent. She had raw skill that many of your contemporaries would kill for, skill that she’d only hone over time. She was going to be an incredible actor if this industry didn’t destroy her first. 

“Who brought you here today?” You asked Catherine when the read was over, the casting director already talking conspiratorially with her assistant. 

“My mom,” she said. “She’s in the waiting room.” 

“Can I meet her?” You asked. 

“Yeah!” She said eagerly. “She’d love that!” 

 You flagged Joel down from his spot in the corner and followed her there, her mom jumping up when she saw her come through the door. 

“Hey kiddo!” She said excitedly, hugging her daughter. “How’d it go?” 

She noticed you then, her eyes going a little wide at the sight of you. 

“Hi,” you smiled. “I’m…” 

“I know,” she cut you off, her eyes still wide but going somehow wider. “Oh my God, that was probably so rude, I’m sorry!” 

You laughed. 

“It’s fine,” you said. “Honestly, if it didn’t make me feel like such a self-centered jerk, my life would probably be a lot easier if I just assumed everyone knew who I was. You’re Catherine’s mom?” 

“Yeah,” she said. “Margie.” 

“Hi Margie,” you said. “It’s good to meet you. Catherine is really incredible, you know.” 

“I know,” Margie said, tugging her daughter against her side and giving her a squeeze. “Trust me, we wouldn’t even be trying this if she wasn’t. She just begged and begged for years and eventually it was so obvious she was so good that we should at least give it a shot.” 

Catherine beamed at that and you smiled, the familiar pinch of tears at the back of your throat that you swallowed as you did. Her mother seemed nothing like your own. 

“I took a look at her resume, looks like you’re pretty new?” You asked and Margie nodded. “Well, getting started is hard, there’s a lot to navigate. Can I see your phone?” 

She all but dove into her pocket and unlocked it before handing it over. 

You entered your number, saving it with your first name and last initial. 

“Don’t share that around,” you said, giving Margie her phone back. “But if you need anything - anything at all - give me a call or a text. Alright?” 

“We gotta go,” Joel said quietly behind you. “Cutting it close.” 

You just nodded before turning to Catherine. 

“It was really great working with you today,” you smiled. 

“You too,” she said, smiling hugely. 

“Looking forward to doing it again soon,” you said, giving her a hug and a wave before going back to the audition room. Your bag was in the corner and you grabbed it before going to the casting director. 

“I want Catherine,” you said, already going through your bag for your makeup kit. 

“She was very strong,” she replied. “But she had the shaky start and…” 

“No,” you said, cutting her off. “She’s it. No one else came close. Not trying to tell you how to do your job but it’s Catherine. She’s just green but she’s young, she’ll get used to it quick. Trust me.” 

She considered you for a moment. 

“Alright,” she sighed eventually. “She was the top pick going into today but if we need to recast because she can’t hack it…” 

“We won’t,” you said. “I’ll make sure she’s got what she needs.” 

“Alright,” she said. “I’ll confirm with the director but we’ll get her.” 

You got changed into something far less comfortable than the leggings and sweatshirt you’d been wearing but looked way better for TV - Frank putting together a pair of velvet wide-legged trousers and matching jacket with a mesh turtleneck - and did your makeup and hair as quickly as you could before rushing to the car, Joel on high alert any time you were outside. 

“You were good with her,” he said once you were safely underway. 

“Hm?” 

“The girl,” Joel said, his voice gruff. “You were good with her. She was nervous, I could tell.” 

“Oh,” you said, watching the back of his head in front of you, as if that would tell you anything about what he was thinking. “Yeah. I just remember what it was like to audition like that. It’s lot of pressure.” 

“Can’t imagine doin’ that to a kid,” he said harshly. “Should get to just be a kid.” 

“There’s a reason I don’t want Ellie growing up here,” you said, looking out the window at the city going by. “Don’t want her getting any ideas.” 

The car pulled up to the theater, a hoard of people outside the doors waiting for you. 

“Ready?” Joel asked over his shoulder, his dark eyes meeting yours, something about the depth of his gaze making it impossible to look away. 

“Ready,” you said. 

He got out first and he tried to rush you through the crowd but you saw a little girl who had to be about seven or eight - wearing a t-shirt with the duck you’d voiced years ago, when Ellie was about her age - watching you with hopeful eyes. 

“Hi there,” you smiled, getting down on her level. “What’s your name?”

“Parker,” she said, smiling hugely, one of her front teeth missing. 

“Hi Parker,” you smiled back. “It’s so nice to meet you! I really like your shirt.” 

“It’s my favorite movie!” She said excitedly. 

“You have excellent taste,” you said with a wink. You nodded to the piece of paper clutched to her chest. “What do you have there?” 

Her face lit up for a moment and she thrust the paper at you. 

“It’s my drawing!” She said. “I did it myself!” 

You took it and looked down at it, a childish, colored pencil version of the duck you’d played there on the page. 

“Parker, this is so good!” You said, smiling at her. “You’re such a good artist! Is that what you’re in school for right now? Art? What college do you go to?” 

“I don’t go to college!” She laughed. 

“You don’t!” You gasped in mock surprise. “What! How old are you? 20? 21?” 

“I’m seven!” She beamed. 

“Oh, my goodness,” you said, looking back at the paper. “You were such a good artist and so grown up I figured you were much older.” 

You gave her the paper back

“Can you sign it for me?” She asked, holding it out with a pen. 

“Well, the artist is usually the one to sign their work,” you said. “But… I’ll sign it if you do, too.” 

She beamed at that and you let her use your back to sign her name on her drawing before passing it off to you. You signed it, too, and gave it back before taking a selfie with her mom’s phone. 

“Alright,” Joel said when you stood up again, his face drawn tight, his hand on the middle of your back. “Let’s get you inside, fuckin’ sitting ducks out here.” 

“Oh, we’re fine,” you waved him off, going back to the crowd and taking selfies and signing autographs as you worked your way into the theater. 

“You like trying to give me a damn heart attack?” He asked once you were inside. 

“Everyone needs a hobby,” you said wryly as Quinn rushed over to you with a production assistant at her back. “Should try getting one yourself, you know.” 

“Jesus,” he muttered, rolling his eyes but following you to the greenroom all the same. 

Quinn reviewed the final topics for the interview and you said hi to Jimmy before getting ready to go on stage and put on a show. 

Doing interviews like this one still felt odd to you. Not because they were unusual - you’d gotten used to the talk show circuit by this point in your career - but because of their very nature. The illusion of some intimate conversation between friends on display for the few hundred strangers in the same room and then broadcast for all the world to see. 

You’d crafted a version of yourself for times like this, one that was built to appeal to an audience and seem genuine and real, some artificial sheen to wrap yourself up in that you slipped into like any other character. This one, though, grated on you. The strange dishonesty of it, the character you were playing yourself instead of the creation of someone else.

The interview went along like any other for a while, the two of you bantering back and forth and you sharing funny stories from set that sounded off the cuff but were actually carefully rehearsed to make sure you and your costars’ stories aligned. 

“Speaking of Chris,” Jimmy said as your time was running down and the audience was quieting after another bout of laughter. “I do have to talk about one thing with him.” 

“Just one?” You teased and he laughed. 

“Well, plenty,” he said. “But did you know that you and Chris are going viral?” 

“No,” you laughed. “But I’m sure my publicist does and she’s thrilled. What are we going viral for?” 

“There was a moment in an interview this week,” Jimmy said. “I think we have it…” 

The screen behind you changed and the moment from the junket days earlier played, you and Chris sitting side by side as he started on his rant, one that you’d thought would never see the light of day. 

“First of all, my costar here is the most beautiful woman on the planet and the single most talented actor I’ve ever had the pleasure of working with so you will treat her with the respect she’s due…”

You sat there, cheeks getting hot, pressing your fingers into your thigh, nervous energy making your stomach turn as you watched Chris lay into the reporter. You’d hoped that this clip had been squashed by his publicist, that the reporter honing in on one of your lowest points wouldn’t be put out for all the world to consume. Apparently not.

“That’s all it takes to go viral now, eh?” You joked as the video ended. Jimmy chuckled lightly but no one in the audience laughed. 

“You’ve got to admit, that was a pretty great moment,” he said. “But I was wondering what you thought of it.” 

“I think Chris has a way with words that I can’t quite match,” you smiled a small but tight smile. “And I think if I say anything different, he might go off on me next.” 

That did get some laughs and you laughed with the audience, hoping that you looked playful and fun, not tense and ready to crawl out of your skin. 

“Well we don’t want that,” Jimmy laughed. “Thanks so much for coming on and everyone, go see As We Know It, out Friday!” 

You waved your goodbyes and looked stage right, oddly comforted by Joel’s commanding presence there, his face firm as he watched you. You walked right for him as you left the stage, one of his arms going around you as you came alongside him, something grounding in his touch as he ushered you away. 

“You’re OK,” he said quietly, guiding you toward the door you came in. 

You frowned and looked at him, Joel glancing your way as you did.

“You’re stressed,” he said. “I can tell. I’ve got you.” 

You did a more abbreviated run of the crush of fans this time, stopping for a few selfies and signing a few pictures, but not lingering, instead moving as quickly as you could for the car without looking like you were rushing. 

Joel didn’t get in the front seat this time, instead climbing in back with you. You frowned as he did but he just ordered the driver to start toward the restaurant where you were meeting with producers. 

“You alright?” Joel asked after the car was out of sight from the crowd outside the theater, his eyes oddly soft and open. “That was shitty, them springin’ that on you.” 

“It happens,” you said, looking back at him as intently as he seemed to be looking at you. “I should be used to it. I am usually, but…” 

“Shouldn’t need to be,” he said. “They should act better.” 

You watched him for a moment, trying to puzzle him out but couldn’t see past his stern face with the strangely open eyes. You didn’t understand him. You weren’t sure you ever would. 

“I’ll be fine,” you said when you’d been quiet a little too long. “But thank you.” 

He frowned. 

“For what.” 

“Caring,” you shrugged. “Not many people do. But I’m afraid I need you to look out that window for a minute.” 

His frown deepened. 

“I need to change,” you said. “Shouldn’t be photographed in the same thing this many times so look out that way, please.” 

His jaw quirked but he obeyed, shaking his head a little as he did. 

“Shouldn’t be photographed at all,” he muttered, arms crossed tightly over his chest as you got a pair of black leather pants out of your bag and set them on the seat between you and Joel.

“Probably right,” you said, shrugging out of the jacket and adjusting yourself so you could slide your pants down and off, leaving you just in the mesh top. “But comes with the territory.” 

You dropped the clothes you’d shed beside you, the velvet of the fabric brushing Joel’s arm and he glanced toward you - just a reaction, you told yourself - before he jerked his head back to look out the window again. 

“Oh don’t act like half the planet hasn’t seen me half naked,” you rolled your eyes as you got into the leather pants, a task that was easier said than done in the back seat of an SUV. “I promise, I won’t bite.” 

“Right,” he muttered. 

You got the pants into place and pulled out another jacket, draping it over your shoulders and putting the other clothes away. 

“You’re safe, Big Miller,” your teased, tossing the bag in the trunk. 

“Try to make a habit of not seeing my clients naked,” Joel muttered, settling back into his seat. 

“Sounds boring,” you said. 

He gave you a look and you laughed. 

“Don’t worry,” you said, clapping him on the shoulder. “I don’t think you’re at risk of anyone thinking you’re interested in fucking me. You’re safe.” 

He just grunted and you smiled a little, looking out the window. There was something comfortable when he was like this. You weren’t sure what to do with a Joel who didn’t seem to loathe you, at least a little bit. Even though you wanted him to like you. You weren’t entirely sure why, but you did.

The paparazzi were waiting for you outside the restaurant, too, but you’d been expecting that. Quinn had told them you’d be here and you made sure your pants were actually zipped before getting out and putting on the show you always did, smiling and waving, taking selfies with fans who’d heard you were going to be there, too. 

You kept the show on through dinner, talking with the producers of a period piece you were interested in doing, Joel sitting next to you the entire time, his jaw quirking when Leo joined the table, too. 

But Henry didn’t make a surprise appearance and, after a while, you found yourself relaxing into things, a few too many glasses of wine deep and giggling when you left the restaurant. 

“You got what you need for the premiere?” Quinn asked as you made your way to the door. 

“Frank has a vision,” you said dramatically and Quinn snorted. “Don’t worry, my tits are basically hanging out, the press will love it.” 

“Well I’ll see you there,” she said, kissing you on each cheek. “Need Frank to have a vision for me one of these days.” 

“Call him,” you said eagerly. “I’m sure he’d work his magic! Oh, we could go somewhere matching, that would be fun!” 

“OK, you’re drunk,” Quinn laughed and looked to Joel. “She’s drunk. Make sure she gets out of here safely and doesn’t talk to any of the paps outside?” 

“I’m not drunk!” You protested and Quinn laughed, taking the lapels of your jacket in your hands. 

“You’re drunk,” she said. “And that’s OK, you’ve been doing a lot lately, you deserve to have a little fun. Just don’t make more work for me in the morning when you do. See you tomorrow at the premiere.” 

“The premiere!” You said and she laughed, giving you and Joel a final wave. You turned to Joel. “We know what I’m wearing for the premiere, what are you wearing for the premiere?” 

“No one cares what I wear for shit,” Joel said, nudging you toward the door. “C’mon, driver’s pulling up.” 

“Why wouldn’t they care?” You pouted, looking over your shoulder toward him. “You’re a good looking man, you know.” 

“Alright, let’s go,” he said, shaking his head. 

“What?” You said. “You are! I’m not trying to hit on you but that’s just an objective fact. Even Frank said so.” 

The flashes caught you off guard. You’d forgotten, for a moment, that it seemed like half the planet cared that you’d had dinner here. You smiled and waved and Joel kept you walking straight toward the car, keeping you from stopping and talking to the people screaming your name. 

“That felt rude,” you said once you were in the car and things were quiet again. 

“Too bad,” Joel said, in back beside you again. “Don’t need to be talkin’ to those assholes, anyway.” 

“There were some fans in there, too, I think,” you said, settling down into your seat. “But back to what I was saying.” 

“No,” Joel said simply. “Seatbelt.” 

“What?” You frowned. “What do you mean ‘no’?” 

“I mean, put your seatbelt on,” he said.  

Your frown deepened and you looked around yourself for a moment before Joel made an irritated sound and reached over you, grabbing the seatbelt and pulling it into place. 

“OK,” you said, adjusting it and sitting up a little straighter. “Seatbelt’s on. Why can’t we keep talking about it? I’m just saying, you should take the compliment…” 

“Not interested,” Joel said. 

“Oh will you calm down?” You rolled your eyes. “I promise I’m not trying to get you into bed, you’re safe from my scary Siren claws, I just mean if you dress well tomorrow at the premiere people would notice because you’re  a good looking person, that’s all.” 

“It don’t matter because I’m not gonna be seen with you,” Joel said, his voice stern. “I’ll be on the other side of where press and shit are but the carpet will be you, some assistant and that Chris guy. Don’t matter what I’m wearing or how good I do or don’t look, alright? Jesus…” 

“Oh,” you said, a little let down. “You really let them talk you into that? I’m shocked.” 

“The premiere’s got it’s own security and it’s actually damn good,” Joel said. “Not good enough for me to just stay home but you’ll be alright. Don’t need me in any more goddamn photos with you than there already are.” 

You watched him for a moment. 

“You still don’t like me, do you?” You asked. 

He frowned, looking at you. 

“Why’s it matter.” 

“I didn’t say it did,” you shrugged. “You just don’t like me.” 

“Don’t need to like you,” he said. “Just need to keep you alive. Besides, the whole damn planet likes you, ain’t that enough?” 

You scoffed. 

“No they don’t.” 

“Yeah?” Joel asked. “What d’you call that shit, the hundreds of people waiting for fucking hours just to catch a glimpse of you if it’s not like.” 

“They don’t like me,” you said. “They don’t know me. They’re obsessed with a commodity. I’m not a person to them, I’m just a weird combination of every part I’ve ever played, every passing idea they’ve decided to assign to me, some idealized creation that doesn’t exist but they’re convinced is real. You know me, at least a little, and you don’t like me.”

“You’re drunk.” 

“I’m right,” you said, your stomach twisting at that. You shouldn’t care what Joel thought of you but you did. There were so few people on this planet who knew you - actually knew you - and he was one of them. And he didn’t see something in you worth liking. 

The car pulled up to your driveway and Joel got out first, going around and opening your door. 

“C’mon,” he said, offering you his hand. “Like you or not, you got an early day.” 

You took his hand - large and warm and secure - and slipped down to the ground, tottering on your heels enough that it made you laugh, Joel steadying you as you went.

“I trust you to actually get yourself to bed?” Joel asked as he led you inside. 

You scoffed. 

“Where else am I gonna go?” 

“Sure you’d find some way to get into trouble,” he replied wryly. 

“I’ll go to bed,” you rolled your eyes. “See you in the morning Big Miller.” 

***

Joel watched you head down the hall, weaving a little as you walked before disappearing into your room, trying not to think about the way the fucking leather pants hugged your ass or the way your hips moved when you walked. 

“Jesus,” he muttered to himself, stalking off to the kitchen to get a water. 

You just don’t like me. 

Lord, how he wished that were true. 

He liked you alright. Far more than he should. Enough that the entire planet’s fucking obsession with you was starting to make sense. 

He tried not to think about that. 

Liking you was not a good idea. It was a completely horrible idea, actually. He wanted to go back to how he felt before he’d come here. It seemed like so long ago now, before he knew about your mom and Elise and Anna, before what you’d told him - and clearly hadn’t - about that fucking producer, before he saw you laughing with a friend or making kids smile just because you could. He wanted to go back to before you were a person - a real person, one with fears and wants and hurts - instead of some rich asshole he could pretend was a different species from himself. 

It wasn’t a good idea to care about you. He had to protect you, he couldn’t be distracted by things like your fucking feelings. Caring about you was dangerous. 

He opened the fridge and went to grab a bottle of water but, instead, took one of the beers that was sitting there. Not that drinking right now was a good idea, either, but fuck it. 

Joel brought the beer to the pool and sat on the edge of it, the glow of your bedroom light almost tempting. The curtain covered the window but he could make out the silhouette of you through the glass and gauzy fabric. You must not have a shirt on, the outline of your breasts clear in the hazy, warm light. He watched for a moment as the outline of you pulled on some baggy piece of fabric, covering yourself, and he forced himself to look back at the water. 

He wasn’t going to think about that. He wasn’t. 

He wasn’t going to admit that he thought about it the day before, too. 

He wasn’t going to admit that he thought he might break his fucking jaw from clenching it as he watched you with the actors during the audition shit the day before. 

You with these men all made for the screen, designed to be your fucking equal in a way he never could be even if he tried - which he wouldn’t because it didn’t matter. They read lines with you and he watched as you looked at them with adoration, touched them with some kind of longing, pressed your body to theirs, arching around them to fit yourself to them like you belonged there. Because you did belong there. If not with these men in particular then with a man like them. Not a man like him.

Not that it mattered. It didn’t fucking matter. 

No, he wasn’t going to think about those things. He wasn’t going to think about the way your tits looked in that fucking dress that Frank had asked his opinion on. He wasn’t going to think about glancing over at you in the car today when he knew he fucking shouldn’t have and seeing you there, half naked in your fucking see through shirt, your thighs looking so warm and welcoming and fucking soft. 

He wasn’t. 

He’d thought about it the night before. He wasn’t proud of that but he had, the image of you getting fitted for the damn dress at the forefront of his mind. It was like his head was a scratched record, skipping over that point in time again and again and again. 

He tried to think about anything else as he stood in the shower that night but fucking couldn’t, his cock half hard as he tried to shove the memory of you away. 

When he went to bed, he caved to his baser instincts. He decided to jerk off. Just to get it out of his system because he couldn’t be still stuck on this the next morning and he didn’t think he could sleep with his balls swollen and aching as they were. 

He tried looking at porn but he couldn’t figure out what the fuck he wanted to watch. He was absently scrolling through a site, nothing standing out until something caught his eye. Your name, on a video. 

He stared at it for a second, your name followed by EVERY SEX SCENE - COMPILATION. 

His mouth went dry. His cock was painfully hard. 

Could he watch that? It’s not like it was really wrong - it wasn’t something that had been shared without your permission and it wasn’t actual porn. It was just something he could see if he went on Netflix right now and sought it out. 

But you hadn’t made it so fucking assholes like him could jerk off to it. And it wasn’t like you were a stranger now, he knew you. Could he do that? 

His dick throbbed at the thought. 

Could he stop himself? 

Joel clicked on the video, his stomach twisting as he pressed play. There was an ad and he read the comments while it played. 

She’s so fucking hot. 

Bet she moans like a whore in real life. 

Fuck I want to choke her out.

She was hotter before, she hit the wall when she hit 30. 

The sound of you moaning in his headphones grabbed his attention, dulling the violent anger that swelling in him when he read what other people said about you. Joel took a shaky breath and made the video full screen. He was already this far down the rabbit hole, he may as well fully commit.

The first chunk of excerpts were from the movie you won the Oscar for and he could only stomach a few seconds of it. You looked disturbingly young to him, just a teenager with a softer version of your face getting on her knees, starting to take off her shirt making him jump ahead. He jumped again when it just felt too strange, watching you start to get undressed or turn around when you were obviously shirtless - seeing your skin this way feeling too keenly wrong. 

It was the last scene in the video that he found himself watching in earnest. It was something more recent, you looked almost the same as you did now, none of the childish softness to your face that had been there in the first scenes. It was a romantic scene, one that was carefully shot so the viewer saw nothing illicit. The curve of your bare waist, the edge of the swell of your breast, a hint of your ass. 

But Joel liked it this way, this moment not tinged with the wrongness the others were. You moaned as your on screen lover pushed inside you - or mimicked it, Joel corrected himself - your fingers spreading wide over the man’s back. 

Joel took his cock in his hand, swallowing hard, his heart beating fast. He worked himself slowly as he watched as the man on screen explored your body, close up shots that revealed nothing interspersed with your face as you gasped in pleasure. 

He let himself get lost in that, in the sounds you made, stroking himself harder, faster. He wanted to make you make those sounds. He wanted to press his lips to the delicate skin of your throat and kiss and lick and suck as he sank inside of you. He wanted his hands to run over the softness of you, to press his firm chest to your plush one and feel your heart beat through your skin. He wanted to feel you swallow him whole, his body slotting into yours as he made you come. 

You moaned and gasped on the video and he let himself pretend that it was for him and he came, imagining it was you and not his own fucking hand he was buried inside as rope after rope of his come spilled over his skin. 

His cheeks got hot as he closed the video and cleaned himself up, a pile of tissues on his nightstand the only sign of his indiscretion. 

He tried to clear his mind as he settled in to sleep, reminding himself of what he already knew: You were not meant for something like him. It didn’t matter what he wanted, you were for someone better than him. You needed someone beautiful like you, someone with money and power and purpose. You deserved someone like you. And he needed to get past that, at least enough that he could do his fucking job and keep you safe. That was all he was good for now. He knew that. 

He tried to remind himself of that again as he sat by the edge of the pool, his mind lingering on you, on your striking beauty and disquieting kindness and keen talent. 

He took a sip of beer. 

It didn’t matter, he told himself. None of it mattered. 

That was the truth of it. Even if you were his equal - even if he was rich and famous or you were just some waitress or school teacher or something besides the most famous woman on earth - it wouldn’t matter. It’s not like he could do anything about it, anyway. 

About a year after he lost Sarah, he’d tried dating. It hadn’t been his idea but Tommy had set him up with a friend of a friend and it hadn’t gone well. Not because she wasn’t a good woman - she was. She was kind, smart, beautiful. 

But it didn’t seem to matter what Joel did, he couldn’t seem to bring himself to really care for her. He liked her well enough. Enjoyed her company and enjoyed her body but any real affection seemed far away. He’d broken it off before things would need to get too serious, just the thought of getting any further involved making his chest get tight and his head swim. He wasn’t meant for things like that anymore. 

He’d left humanity behind when his daughter had. Anything like love and care was closed to him now, he knew that. 

So why did he keep thinking about you? 

He downed the rest of the beer and sighed before getting up, looking toward your window. He watched the outline of you pull back the blankets and climb into your bed before stretching and turning out the lamp. 

He just shook his head and went inside, putting the bottle in the recycling bin before heading to his own room, trying not to think of you lying on the other side of the wall. 

It didn’t make a difference. You were still in his dreams that night. 

You were standing opposite him like you had the men you’d read lines with but, instead of the comfortable clothes you’d worn to the audition, you were in the mesh top you’d had on that day. Just that and your panties, like you’d been in the back seat of the car. 

“Ready?” You asked, your eyes meeting his and he actually let himself look into them now, and how soft and deep they were. You didn’t wait for his response. “I’ll read you in.” 

Your body changed, the physicality of you shifting as you became someone else inside your skin. 

“What are you so afraid of?” You asked, almost forcefully. 

Joel knew his line. He’d heard it enough the day before. 

“You!” He said. “I’m afraid of you, of this power you have… I can’t protect you, I can’t…” 

“I don’t need you to protect me,” you cut him off, stepping closer. “I need you to trust me.” 

You were close enough that you were touching him. 

He knew this part, too, but he didn’t stick to his lines. 

“But I need to protect you,” he said. “It’s all I know how to do, I… I can’t…” 

You reached up and ran your fingers through his hair, your eyes meeting his, your body arching against his own and he could feel every line of you through his clothes. You moved to kiss him and he went to meet you but you stopped just short, your breath warm on his skin. 

“Why didn’t you protect me, Joel?” You whispered, your lips brushed his as you spoke. 

He frowned, pulling back ever so slightly. 

This wasn’t in the script. 

“You should have saved me,” you said, stepping back from him. 

Suddenly, he was somewhere new with you. The middle of the road, a burning car to one side of you. You stepped back from him again, cradling your arm to your chest, blood spreading quickly over your skin from a wound at your stomach. 

“No,” he reached for you, but you stepped back. Your ankle was at an odd angle, making you limp. “No, this isn’t…” 

“You should have been there,” you said, tears welling in your eyes. “You should have saved me. Why didn’t you save me, Joel?” 

“I…” he began but you collapsed then and he jumped to catch you, pulling your body tight to his chest, panting for breath. “No, no, no, you’re OK, it’s alright, you’re gonna be OK, you hear me?” 

“No,” you reached up and ran your fingers through his hair. “I won’t. Because you didn’t save me.” 

He woke with a start, ready to jump between you and any unseen threat. His chest was tight so he could barely breathe, his whole body covered in a sheen of sweat. 

It took him a moment to remember where he was, in a bed that was his but wasn’t, in a foreign land that wasn’t really so different from his own. It was still dark outside and he clutched at his chest, trying to calm himself down. 

You were safe. You were safe and he was close enough to you that he could protect you if something happened. 

He repeated it in his head like a mantra and it helped but only so much. There was this little, nagging thought that, while he thought you were safe and well, he couldn’t be sure. Not until he saw you. 

It was early, still dark outside, but he checked his phone. It wasn’t the middle of the night, at least. 

He got up on the off chance that you might be awake, glancing toward your bedroom door and seeing it closed. But it looked like there was a light on in the main part of the house so he followed it, finding you leaning against the counter in the kitchen in a bathrobe, a towel around your head. You were scrolling through something on your tablet, drinking from a mug of coffee. There were only a few lights on, the room still mostly dark, something quiet and almost illicit about his presence there. But the tension in his body eased all the same. You were whole, he could relax. 

“Did I wake you?” You frowned, glancing up at him from the glow of the tablet screen. 

“No,” he said, almost defensive. “Why.” 

“Because,” you shrugged, looking back at the tablet. “You usually wear a shirt when I don’t catch you by surprise.” 

He glanced down at himself and almost groaned. He hadn’t even thought about putting something on. 

“Just woke up,” he said, going to get a cup of coffee for himself. “Didn’t think you’d be awake yet.” 

“Well, I needed to get a workout and a shower in before the glam team shows up,” you said, taking a drink from a green smoothie that he hadn’t noticed before. “Don’t worry, I didn’t go anywhere. I just swam some laps and Quinn’s assistant brought me this.” 

You held up the cup and waggled it in his direction. He rolled his eyes. 

“Yeah, because heaven forbid I’m concerned about you gettin’ grabbed by some stalker,” he muttered, getting himself a coffee and leaning against the counter across from you and tried to resist the urge to look down the neck of your robe, something that would be so easy to do with you bent over the counter the way you were. 

Then you stood up straight, setting the tablet down, making his life a little easier. 

“I’m sorry for yesterday,” you said, your coffee cup tight in your hand. 

Joel frowned. 

“What d’you mean.” 

“I mean,” you took a deep breath. “That I behaved unprofessionally. I shouldn’t have gotten drunk, I shouldn't have said the things I did. You’re right, it’s not your job to like me and it doesn’t matter if you do or not. I hope I didn’t make you too uncomfortable but, if I did, I apologize. You’re good at your job and I appreciate the work you do. It won’t happen again.” 

“Oh,” Joel said, taken aback. “Um… It’s… It’s fine.” 

“Good,” you said, downing the last of your coffee. “Glam squad will be here in a little while. You may want to hide while you can. I might promise professionalism but I can’t speak for my stylist.” 

Joel snorted at that. 

“Good advice.” 

You smiled tightly, taking the smoothie back toward your bedroom. 

“Hey, Siren,” he said, almost wincing as he said it but he couldn’t seem to bring himself to use your real name, the words seeming almost too intimate. But you stopped all the same, facing him with your eyebrows raised. “I meant that. It’s fine. You didn’t do anything wrong, don’t go beating yourself up about it.” 

“Thanks, Big Miller,” you smiled a little, softer this time. “I appreciate that.” 

Joel ate something and got dressed before people started showing up for you. He met each of them at the door, making sure he knew who was in the house and what they were there to do. Makeup artists and hairstylists and, of course, Frank and his assistant. There was even a team of people escorting a fucking necklace and earrings in some oversized red box that made Joel grind his teeth. It was a little surprising, just how many people it took to get you ready to go to a fucking event. 

He couldn’t imagine what they could all be fucking doing, especially not for hours upon hours. It’s not like there was anything on you to improve, he wasn’t sure why the hell it’d take an entire day to get you ready for anything. 

But when you eventually emerged from your room, he understood. 

Frank was carrying the back of your dress while you held up the front and you were nodding along to something the woman beside you was saying and Joel couldn’t help but stare at you. 

It was like you were a sculpture or a painting, more a work of art than any mortal thing. The gown looked like it had been made for you, finding and highlighting every soft curve of your body. There was a diamond necklace with a massive center stone resting in the hollow of your throat, making him think about how delicate your skin would be there. Your makeup perfectly framed your eyes and the arch of your cheekbones and the plush of your lips. Your hair and nails and eyelashes were all longer and more elegant than they’d been just hours before and you were so beautiful it was hard to look at you. It was painful, wrong in some way. You were something beyond him entirely, ethereal and other. He wasn’t meant to look upon the likes of you. 

“You ready?” You asked, turning your attention to him. 

“Yeah,” he said, voice rougher than he’d meant it to be. “You really gonna watch an entire movie in that thing?” 

“Not the most uncomfortable gown I’ve worn, trust me,” you cocked a smile at him. “But we should go, there’s always traffic for premieres.” 

Joel just grunted noncommittally. He needed to get his shit together. He couldn’t afford to let you distract him just because you were beautiful. Not after his dream this morning, not when he knew what was at risk. 

He stared determinedly out the window all the way to the theater. 

“You’ll have to let me know what you think of it,” you said as the two of you sat in traffic, getting closer and closer to the red carpet. 

“Of what,” Joel said, looking your way for the first time in a while, forcing himself to not let his eyes linger on the swell of your breasts, the curve of your throat. 

“Of the film,” you said. “You might be the only person here who will be honest to me about it. I’m curious to know your thoughts.” 

“Not a movie critic,” he muttered. 

“I know,” you said. “That’s why I’m curious.” 

The two of you finally made it to the red carpet and the door opened, your costar there waiting for you with his hand out. 

“My God, love,” he said, looking you up and down. “Do you ever look anything but perfect?” 

“I do what I can,” you smiled, giving him your hand and letting him help you out of the limo. 

Joel got out, too, going around the back of the crowd instead of following you up the carpet, the distance from you making his heart beat faster and his muscles clench. 

“Fuckin’ risky,” he muttered to himself, following your path from the other side of the cluster of fans who were pressed against velvet ropes. There was a large screen set up, a camera tracking you and Reese’s progress down the carpet and Joel kept his head on a swivel, watching you and the crowd and the space at the edges for any threats, trying not to grind his teeth at the way your costar’s hands rested at your waist, hip, back. 

He’d very nearly relaxed when you and Reese had worked your way down most of the fans. You’d almost made it to the press, the more contained part of the carpet where you’d be more secure. Maybe, he thought, he was just being paranoid. Maybe there wasn’t anything to worry about here. 

You started talking to a young man at the end of he cluster of fans, one not much older than the college idiots that seemed to dominate Austin half the fucking year, but there was something about him that set Joel on edge. 

You took a selfie with him and signed something for him but he kept clutching at your arm, not letting you move. Reese’s usually carefree expression shifted, eyebrows drawing together, lips pursing. He put his hand at your waist and gave the man a wave, saying something and smiling a smile that didn’t reach his eyes before pulling you away. You smiled warmly at the man, probably saying something nicer than he deserved, and let Reese lead you on but the man wasn’t letting you go. Your eyes went up, immediately finding Joel’s, a spark of fear in your gaze he could see even from this far away. 

Both of the man’s hands closed around your wrist and he yanked you back toward him, pulling you out of Reese’s hold and making you stumble and Joel was moving before he fully realized what he was doing. 

It was instinctual, shoving his way through the press of fans with no care for who he knocked down on the way. Even with the tightly packed crowd, he was to you in seconds, the man’s hands locked tight around your wrist, bending it at an unnatural angle, Reese trying to pry the man’s hands away from you. Your eyes were wide, the hand that wasn’t in the mans’ grip on his elbow almost soothingly, as though your gentleness was all he needed. 

“No, you don’t understand!” The man was pleading. “I love you, I need you, I’ll do everything for you, everything, no one else will ever love you the way I do, I…” 

Before he could finish talking, Joel punched him across the face. The blow was hard and sharp and sent the man reeling, almost taking you with him before Reese caught you around your stomach and pulled you back from the velvet ropes. 

Event security appeared then, swooping in on the man as he sat on the ground, looking dazed. 

“About fuckin’ time,” Joel snapped to them before hurdling the rope and going to you. Reese had angled you away from the camera that had been following the pair of you down the carpet, cradling your wrist in his hands, saying something to you that Joel couldn’t quite hear. 

“You OK?” Joel asked, a little breathless. Your head snapped up, your wide eyes meeting his, something almost frantic in your gaze. Your chest was heaving, your breaths coming in fearful little pants and he closed the distance between the two of you quickly, taking the uncanny beauty of your face in his hand. You closed your eyes, pressing your cheek into his palm and his fingers held you tighter than they should but he couldn’t seem to pull back. Your skin was soft, smooth, warm, perfect. You took a deep breath. “You’re safe, it’s OK.” 

“Joel,” you said softly, your voice trembling and wet, none of your typical bravado to be found. 

“I know,” he said. “But they got him. Not gonna let him hurt you, you’re safe.” 

You nodded into him. 

“Do we need to leave?” Reese looked to Joel, his brows drawn tight together. 

“No,” you said quickly before Joel had a chance to respond. He frowned, going to argue with you but you cut him off. “No, we’re almost to the press, we need to just keep going, it’s fine, I’m fine. We keep going.” 

Joel searched your eyes, your face still in his hand and, as afraid as you looked, you were just as determined, too. 

“Fine,” Joel clenched his jaw. 

“Thank you,” you said quietly. 

“I’ve got you,” Reese said gently to you before turning back to Joel. “I’ll take care of her.” 

Joel nodded once, firmly, before finally - painfully - taking his hand back from you. You closed your eyes and took a deep, centering breath. You raised your chin defiantly and steeled your spine and opened your eyes again. You smiled a little as you did and, for the first time, Joel recognized a shift in you. It was like the auditions, when you embodied someone else. You weren’t yourself anymore, you were just another character now, someone with your face and voice but detached from you. 

“Let’s go,” you said, leading Reese down the carpet toward the press. 

Joel watched until you were at the backdrop, smiling and posing with your costar, making sure event security was close by before slipping back into the crowd. 

The man who’d grabbed you had been wrestled away from the crowd, tucked off to the side and now in custody of police. Joel went and found them, introducing himself to the cops and telling them about the stalking threat he’d been hired to protect against. 

The man was still yelling, fully sobbing as he said again and again how much he loved you, how all he wanted was to take care of you. Joel wished the police would turn their backs for a moment, just a moment, just long enough for him to get another hit in on him. He wanted to hurt him, scare him, make him realize that you were protected and that he couldn’t get to you.

Joel had never dealt with a stalker before, but he wouldn’t be surprised if this was the guy. The level of obsession, the passion, the willingness to hurt you to get what he wanted made it seem likely. 

That was good, he thought. If this was the guy, you were out of immediate danger. You’d be safe - or as safe as someone as famous as you could be. There was a certain sense of peace in him at that. 

But there was this keen longing in him, too. 

If this was your stalker, his contract would be up. He would go back to Texas with you, pack up the things at your house and say goodbye to this strange semblance of a life he’d found himself in with you and your niece. He’d be without the both of you, alone in the tomb of his house, waiting for the next time he could jump in front of a bullet for someone else so he could feel alive. 

He tried to ignore the tightness in his chest at that thought, the sickening feeling in his stomach. 

This had been a mistake, this whole fucking job had been a mistake. The second he knew who you were he should have told Tommy no, he couldn’t. You were too close to Sarah, the job too long lasting. It was too big a risk for him, too much of a chance for him to get attached to someone he had no business getting attached to. 

“Joel.” 

He looked around to find Quinn at his back, her face drawn. 

“She alright?” He asked, his arms crossed over his chest. 

“She made it through the press but she might have a broken wrist,” she said, her voice low. “She’s ducking out the back once the film starts, we need to get her to a doctor. She has fight training starting soon and an injury is going to be who knows how much in production delays…” 

Joel bristled. 

“And if she’s got a broken fuckin’ bone it needs to be treated.” 

“Obviously,” Quinn rolled her eyes. “I thought that went without saying.” 

“She’s not just a fucking profit center,” he narrowed his eyes at your manager. “She’s a person.” 

Quinn looked at him for a moment, considering him. 

“I know that, Joel,” she said gently. “I just wasn’t aware you did.” 

Quinn, at least, had the foresight to get your usual SUV to pick you up instead of the limo you’d arrived in. Security let Joel in the back door and you were waiting for him there, looking so out of place among the boxes and storage in your gown and jewels. You were stiff and oddly small, shoulders hunched as you leaned back against a cinderblock wall, cradling your injured wrist to your chest. Someone tried to talk to him but Joel ignored them, instead going straight for you. 

“Changed your mind?” He asked, hands in his pockets so he didn’t touch you again. 

You looked at him through your lashes, something sharply vulnerable in your eyes for a moment before you straightened and smirked a little. 

“Figured going to an afterparty with a wrist the size of a grapefruit was a bad look,” you said, showing your arm to him. Your wrist was swollen and discolored and he resisted the urge to take it gently in his hands. “Don’t want the press to be about this, we want it to be about the movie.” 

“Alright, c’mon then,” he said. “Get you checked out.” 

He put his arm around you, tucking you against his side as you held your wrist against yourself.  He stayed close to you on the drive, your body warm and relaxed against him. 

“Do you think that was him?” You asked quietly, voice small. 

“I don’t know,” Joel said. His hand was on your arm. Your skin was soft. “I talked to the police, told them about the stalker, they’re gonna investigate…” 

“He scared me,” you said softly. “I know there were threats but… It didn’t seem real. I didn’t think anything would happen.” 

“I know,” Joel said, his thumb tracing a slow, steady path over your skin. “I’ve got you. Keep you safe.” 

He said it as much for himself as he did for you. He tried not to think about why he needed to. 

The driver took the two of you to a small doctor’s office that, at this hour, was quiet. A nurse met you both at the back and you were quickly ushered into an exam room and given an x-ray, you in your gown on the cold paper of the exam table a sight that made Joel’s heart clench. 

“You did indeed break it,” the doctor said, pointing out a thin line on the x-ray. “It’s a minor fracture, shouldn’t need a full cast and just a splint for three to five weeks.” 

“How soon before I can train?” You frowned. “Can I train in a splint?” 

“That really what you should be worried about?” Joel asked, his arms crossed over his chest. 

You looked over to him, your eyebrows knitting together. 

“There’s a whole movie depending on me, Joel,” you said. “People have contracts, they have bills they need to pay. I can’t just take weeks off.” 

“Can’t make a movie if you don’t heal,” he muttered. 

“You need to take at least three weeks before you do anything extreme with that wrist,” the doctor said. “If you don’t, you’ll need a cast and you’ll be out of commission even longer.” 

“Alright Doc,” you smiled. “You win, I’ll take it easy.” 

“Good,” he said. “I’d hate to see you try to hold an Oscar in a cast.” 

It was a relief to get you back home again, in a contained space that Joel had gotten to know in the last week. Frank and a hairstylist met you there, the three of you disappearing into your room for a while and Joel considered sitting in his own, not sure he could handle seeing you again but then, he wasn’t sure he could handle not seeing you, either. So he sat on the couch, existing in a state of limbo, not sure what to do next. 

“Sounds like you saved the day,” Frank said when he eventually emerged, a garment bag over his arm. 

“Dunno about that,” Joel said. “Still let her get her fuckin’ wrist broke.” 

“Seems like it could have been a lot worse if you hadn’t stepped in,” he said. “Broken wrist will heal.” 

Joel just grunted. 

“Anyway,” he continued. “Thank you. She’s one of the good ones.” 

He left before Joel got a chance to respond. The hairstylist left not long after, a bag of hair in her hands, and, when you didn’t come out right after, he almost thought you’d gone to bed. He was considering doing the same when you slowly, almost cautiously, came down the hall, peering into the living room as though your presence in your own home was somehow illicit. 

“Oh,” you said, in an oversized t-shirt and sweatpants and wrist splint. The makeup was gone, the long nails and lashes and hair, too. But you were still beautiful, maybe even more so now. It was the most human Joel had ever seen you. “Sorry, I thought you’d be in your room…” 

“Don’t need to apologize,” he shrugged. “Your house. You OK?” 

“Fine,” you shrugged. “A little sore but… I’ll be fine, it’s just a minor fracture.” 

Joel nodded slowly and you stood there awkwardly for a moment. 

“I’m going to make tea,” you said. “Eat something solid for the first time today now that I’m out of that dress. Call Ellie, check in. Want to join?” 

He wanted to say yes. He wanted to say yes, follow you to the kitchen and be next to you, have tea, talk to Ellie. He wanted to keep existing in the same sphere as you, be folded into your life the way he had become the last few months. 

But he couldn’t. He knew that. You and Ellie and your lives weren’t for him. 

“Should go to bed,” he said instead. “Been a long week.” 

You smiled - a little sadly, he thought - but nodded and went to the kitchen and he listened to you just exist for a moment before he left you there alone. 

It didn’t seem to make a difference. He dreamed of you again. 

It was different this time. You were far away from him, in the t-shirt and sweats you’d changed into, larger than life but out of reach. All he could do was watch as someone hurt you and you looked for him to help you. He ran and ran but he couldn’t reach you, couldn’t do a goddamn thing except watch you hurt because he couldn’t do the one thing he’d been built to do. 

He stared at the ceiling when he woke up, his heart pounding and body tense. 

He had to stop this. Whatever road he was going down, whatever he was doing, he had to stop. He couldn’t live his life this way, where he was always afraid and waiting for things to go wrong. He’d learned that lesson once, the hard way. He couldn’t do it again. He just couldn’t. 

“Ready to get back to the Lone Star State?” You asked, already in the kitchen when Joel got up. 

“Guess so,” he said. You watched him, like you were waiting for him to elaborate, but he didn’t. 

“Well,” you said when he was quiet for too long. “I know Ellie is looking forward to you coming back, she told me something about that video game you guys…” 

“Look,” Joel cut you off. “Ellie’s a great kid…” 

“Agreed.” 

“But, if that guy was your stalker, I got no reason to be at your house all the time,” he said. 

“Oh,” you said, your shoulders slumping a little. “Right. I hadn’t really… That makes sense. Yeah.” 

Joel poured himself a cup of coffee. 

“Should go get packed,” he said. 

He didn’t wait for a response, just going back to his room to gather his things and avoid you and it was a relief when the car was there, ready to take the two of you to the airport. 

“We do have to make one stop on the way,” you said, holding the red box that had shown up yesterday. 

Joel frowned. 

“Don’t you got people for that?” 

“Well, the original plans got a little fucked with the whole ‘crazy man at the premiere’ thing,” you said. “But keep your shirt on, Big Miller, it’ll only take five minutes.” 

“Whatever you say,” he said, rolling his eyes, wishing he was back in Texas already. 

He sat in back next to you, anyway. 

The stop at the jeweler was quick - you trading the large and ostentatious red box for a much smaller one - and it wasn’t long before the two of you were ushered onto the plane, the last people aboard as you tucked yourself into the window seat in the front row, a baseball cap tugged low over your face and a sweatshirt covering the brace on your arm. 

Joel was tense the entire flight. He hated when people realized you were aboard and started demanding autographs and selfies, when you got up to use the bathroom, when the plane hit turbulence and he knew there wouldn't be a damn thing he could do to save either of you if the plane went down and that level of powerlessness disturbed him at his core. 

He’d been stupid with you. Careless, reckless, dumb. He knew better now, he knew where giving a fuck led and it was nowhere good. He thought that wasn’t a risk with you, that your spoiled fucking attitude and obscene wealth and the ease of your life would make it so he could never care for you but he was wrong. He gave a shit. For the first time in five years, he cared. 

And he needed to get far away from that before it killed you both. 

He went wordlessly to his room at your house in Austin when you got there, Seth beating you both to the house to take over so Joel could have a few days off. He grabbed a few things he knew he’d want and resolved to ask Seth to pack the rest for him when the police confirmed that it had, indeed, been your stalker last night. For now, he just needed to get out of here and get away from you. 

“Hey, Joel!” You followed after him as he stalked toward his truck, his duffle over his shoulder. 

He gritted his teeth and turned to face you. 

“What.” 

You all but flinched back from him, blinking in surprise at his curt tone. He knew he was being short with you but it needed to happen. It had to. 

“Oh,” you said, the smaller red box from the jeweler in your hands. “I just…” You thrust it toward him, looking at him with wide and oddly honest eyes. “I got you something. I ordered it before the thing yesterday, just to say thank you for everything in LA, but it can be kind of a going away gift now, too, since… well, anyway.” 

He took it, the fact that you seemed out of sorts disorienting, and opened it. Inside was a watch. It was simple, rectangular with a silver case and black leather strap, but obviously luxurious. 

“It’s engraved,” you smiled, fidgeting with your sweatshirt sleeves. “Which is probably dumb but I couldn’t resist, I’m a sucker for shit like engraving, don’t ask me why…” 

“You think this is what I want?” He asked, holding up the box, voice cold.You just blinked at him for a moment. “That I want some fancy fucking jewelry? That I’m like your rich fucking friends you can just buy off or something?” 

“What?” You looked at him, hurt. “No, no, I… I just… Yours is broken and I wanted to say thank you for…” 

“For me doin’ my job,” he cut you off. “That’s what this was, a job. We’re not friends, you don’t need to thank me for shit. You paid me, I protected you, end of story. I don’t want your fancy fucking watch, I don’t want…” 

“Then sell it!” You snapped, angry now. “Consider it a tip, run it over with your car because you hate me so fucking much, tell the tabloids about how the movie star bought you a present, I don’t care! I know you’re thrilled to be rid of me, anyway. Nice knowing you, Miller. Have a nice life.” 

You didn’t give him a chance to respond. Instead, you stalked back into your house, leaving him there with nothing left but a hollow ache in his chest and the watch that he wished he could find a home for on his arm. 

Next Chapter

A/N: Look. If you're here because you've read my other stuff, are we at all surprised that we ended up here? Is anyone surprised that I'm back in my natural habitat - torturing Joel Miller - yet again?

I wish I knew why I was like this, I really do, but alas, here we are. Thanks for reading it and for putting up with my total lack of a posting schedule. I really appreciate you being here and caring about these characters enough to read the monster chapters I put out about them.

Love you!

Taglist: @christinamadsen@eff4freddie@brittmb115@copperhalfcent@r3dheadedwitch @pedropascalsbbg @lovelyjess69 @yopossum @moel-jiller @picketniffler @lilyevanstan1325 @reluctanthalfwayoptimism @wintersquirrel @missladym1981 @mellymbee @canthinkof1user @inept-the-magnificent @secretlyangelic @pedrobae @scarletsloveletter

[diejager]

ugghhhh request box my beloved- thank you diejager and brilliant work as always!

requesting the backstab vs backstab villain! reader x makarov? :) i feel like theyd really just get closer after that ugh- they'll consider it a bonding moment and might as well call it a comedy show right after it. "Ohoho! Classic vladimir!" stuff

Cw: DARKFIC, backstabbing, hopelessly obsessed, dark!reader, simping, tell me if I missed any.

He should have known better. He was Makarov Vladimir —The Makarov Vladimir. He was as feared as he was respected, worshipped by those with wishful minds and shunned by the ilks of unimaginative thinking. He should have, but he let his obsession break loose, rooting in the seams and creases of his brain and corrupted his mind. He let his need for your presence, your fight and the danger you brought blind him of the truth. 

Though he was the first to betray you - or so he had initially thought - to break off from the engagement you both had signed and stab you in the back when you weren’t looking, he had foolishly thought you trusted him fully. With all your heart and mind, that your goal finally aligned fully with him for him to enact his dark betrayal, but you hadn’t and it had come back to bite him in the ass. Makarov had naively believed your sweet words and bloody and deranged acts of violence while working a few favours for him, that he held you heart in his cold and bloodied palm.

Rather, it seemed like it was the opposite, you seem yo have expected this act from him, a contingency plan built before he had any thoughts of backstabbing you. In the works months prior to any plan he’d forged in his bedroom, where eh slept beside you after a rough and passionate night spent in bed, bodies covered in sweat and the monster’s hunger satiated. 

You were slipping through his fingers with men and weapons, reassures he would come to need only after realising you had taken them. Your sweet words and silver tongue had taken them the way it had taken him, forged some liking and favour among his men and cajoled them to following you when you left him in the ruins of his majestic empire. 

It left him in shambles, a - what he once thought - small theft had set him back a few months, having to regain all the work he put into the plan he first built. And he mad —or he should have been. Your sly mind had left him tumbling deeper and deeper into his self-dug hole of dark obsession and admiration. It riled him up and made his heart beat faster, the tell-tale thump-thump of his heart rattling against his ribs and reminded him of his dependence of you.

How he’d grown so used to your being and that conniving tongue of yours. How absolutely in love he was with your mind and conscience and body. How unfathomable it was to build a kingdom without a queen. It was difficult living in a world where he was forced to chase you, left in the dust and trying to gather all he could to get to you, but now that he had a taste of you, he couldn’t just let you off without him. 

Now, the next act of his plan was to find a way to contact you again, to be able to hear the dulce tone of your voice and the softness of your rough hands. He wanted you by his side again.

Taglist: @sae1kie @yeoldedumbslut @bvxygriimes @distracteddragoness @konigsblog @im-making-an-effort @daisychainsinknots @h0n3y-l3m0n05 @danielle143 @tuttifuckinfruttifriday @notspiders @brokenpieces-72 @petwifed @randominstake @haven-1307 @shironasumi @sparky--bunny @bloobewy @cod-z @sweetnanah @aldis-nuts @evolutionarry @kaoyamamegami @cassiecasluciluce

[bellewintersroe]

I DO HAVE A BOB REQ👀 it's heavy angst mixed with a comforting ending, but how would they react (whenever u want but in my faves are Liebgott and Roe) to them thinking their s/o (nurse maybe?) somehow died while saving someone or similar, but actually she managed to escape and run and she reconnects with the battalion a few days later? all battered and bruised but still alive EVEN BETTER IF SHE TAKES TO SAFETY THE PERSON SHE WAS HELPING because imagining them seeing their girl that they thought was dead coming back quite literally from hell alive is AGH💘

I LOVEEEE THIS!!! Thank you Anon I’m excited to write this <3 <3

Warning: mentions of death, grief, war, wounds, etc.

Easy Boys x EasyNurse! Reader - How They React To You Going MIA.

Gene Roe:

- Gene knew (thinks) you were in the church as soon as he watched the bomb explode.

- He kinda freezes and he literally feels his insides running cold and a sickness go through him.

- Can’t be real, I can’t express the level of trauma, pure horror and devastation he feels in that moment. It doesn’t end, the whole time he fully thinks you’re gone. It doesn’t help that the rest of the company are questioning him and going through their own grief for your loss.

- He wants to escape it as much as possible but he knows he can’t. He feels like a statue, completely glued to his foxhole, he runs on autopilot and Winters is about to send him off the line.

- I feel like Gene would have a pretty bad breakdown (understandable) when he’s by himself so he’s not showing the full affects of what he believes is your loss.

- doesn’t help he has absolutely NO answers. He plays the moment over and over again, torturing himself by picturing your last moments, imagining himself being just an hour earlier and getting you out of that church.

- Gene even wished he was with you when that damn bomb went off.

- 3 days pass and Gene’s sat in his foxhole, alone, staring at the enemy line. He’s near enough given up, no gloves, no blanket, he can’t eat, cant sleep.

- “Doc, Captain Winters needs you, pronto.”

- He literally feels like a zombie walking to where he’s needed. All he can think of is you, it’s painful, he can literally feel his chest yearning and breaking and his grief is too much.

- “Yeah we found her running around with the I-company boys, got a little lost, didn’t ya’ nurse?” A man’s words cause Gene’s ears to prick. He can’t see anything but a taller man facing Winters and Nixon with a smaller figure, blanket huddled over- you.

- Ugh- feels like his hearts about to explode. Literally freezes and thinks he’s going to be sick. His heart accelerates and when he hears your voice he quite literally feels faint. 

- “got caught up with a patient there!” You turn around, sending a presence and both of you feel the intense hit of shock to be confronted with one another again. “Excuse me a minute…”

- All of a sudden you’re limping towards Gene. Your forehead is covered with 2 butterfly plasters and you have a nasty bruise under your right eye. Gene thinks he’s seen a ghost.

- Probably hesitates for a moment before you pull him aside, away from where the other men can see. “Gene.” You’d soothe and he’d let out a breath he didn’t even know he was holding.

- Crashes into you. Literally grips you so tightly, he feels like he can’t breathe, his eyes are teary and it’s not until you let out a small yelp that he pulls back.

- “It’s okay, it’s fine Gene, it’s just a bruise.” Hearing your voice sends him into a spiral and he’s even more careful now to pull you close.

- Holds a hand to the back of your head, practically cradles you with wide eyes.

- “I thought- I thought you was dead.” He admitted.

- “No, I got caught up with a patient. After the church got bombed I managed to pull a patient out, Billy from I company- got lost on their lines for a few days, they took me in.”

- Soon enough he’s stammering with quivering hands, checking over you, asking if you’re okay. Winters had called a medic after all.

- Can’t stop looking at you, questioning if it’s all a dream, you’d catch him pinching himself. “Don’t do that Gene, I’m right here.” With a small hand on his cheek he can breathe again.

- Holds your hands tightly, the most affection he can show you in front of all the superiors. He’s still extremely tense, in shock from the close call, but he promises to keep an extra close eye on you, and he keeps that promise.

- Kisses your cuts and bruises when nobody’s looking, probably runs his hand over his face in surprise quite a few times, but honestly he’s sooo fucking relieved, like he actually cried when he saw you.

- “I love you so much, ya can’t do that to me again, evuh’.” With his little accent and a serious tone, ugh he’s a sweetie pie.

Joseph Liebgott:

- It happens in Eindhoven out of all the places.

- One minute you’re both celebrating together, with the rest of the company and the whole town and the next you’re not stationed with the rest of the nurses?

- The town gets bombed and barraged by the Germans that evening and he’s watching in pure horror. Recounts of nurses being KIA during the bombing spread real fast, and he refuses to believe what Battalion HQ are telling him.

- He’s shaking his head real fucking fast, denying and denying to all of them and himself.

- Throws a fucking riot- until he has to practically run off to be alone, wrenching and shaking at the idea that have could’ve happened to you.

- His anger and violence stems out of control, Winters removes him off the line real fucking fast, like he becomes a runner or something just for a break.

- Fraternisation is banned under all conditions, but relationships and affairs still take place, even the most superior of officers know that. So sometimes eyes are averted and now is one of those times that people choose to do that and help Liebgott through his grief.

- But 2 days have passed and it’s so raw, everybody’s in shock and disbelief at your lack of presence, for Joe he’s bottling up a painfully bitter feeling and he’s ready to explode.

- He never thought it would happen to you, you’re a nurse for Christ sake! Genuinely has to pause sometimes to just stop- like he can’t take it. Becomes so close to being sent to the aid station until one today he’s attempting to run a letter back to Battallion HQ when he see’s the back of a young woman wrapped in a blazer, overalls looking very familiar to your own.

- His heart genuinely gets shooting pains and he has to swallow the urge to cry as he watches this woman who painfully resembles you. Her khaki headscarf is bloody and he watches as another officer (he assumed from Dog) guides you inside the building.

- In fact he’s about to look away, until this girls head tilt to the side. He only catches a brief glimpse of her profile, Joe has to squint real hard when he feels his stomach drop.

- His mind has to be playing tricks on him so he turns away as the nurse rushes to aid a man on a stretcher.

- Slams the jeep door, literally kicks a dint into it as he storms his way through town. He just wants to deliver these fucking letters as fast as possible.

- “No, no, he’s German. He helped me out of Eindhoven, you must take care of him!”

- Joe’s head snaps just as he’s shoving the letters into some poor guys arms. He freezes, head lifting at the sound of your voice.

- “What the fuck?” He mutters, stepping a little closer. His breathing and heart speeds when he hears your voice again.

- “Sister. Make sure he gets to the infirmary, please… thank you.”

- He’d recognise that voice from anywhere.

- Literally feels like he’s choking when he stomps over, lost for words and breath and grabs hold of your arm.

- With a gasp, you stand there, bloody and bruised and protecting some Kraut soldier.

- You’re about to protest again until you come face to face with Joe, and suddenly your voice gets hitched in your throat, a loud gasp escaping your lips.

- “Joe!” It’s you that jumps into hug him first.

- Joe grips you tightly, “what the hell are you- what the hell are you doin’ here? Baby- y/n, I thought you were dead.”

- He has to pull back and hold your face to take a look at you and make sure it’s actually you.

- You can feel him shaking, and suddenly your attention is just on Joe and Joe only. He’s practically smothering you, not sure where to put his hands as he lets out a shaky breath.

- “Holy fuck I thought I lost you. They said you were gone. I knew you wouldn’t, I knew you wouldn’t leave me.” He gets super emotional so you two have to take a break somewhere real quick.

- By that I mean in the aid station where you’re supposed to be being patched up but Joe does that for the medic.

- “God dammit you are so stupid, you idiot, I thought I lost you.”

- “The German officer saved me Joe, he pulled me outta the rubble.”

- “he what?! Did he touch you, are you ok?”

- “He’s a nice man, Joe. I wouldn’t be here without him. He’s hurt so I got a little lost taking him back to the infirmary.”

- “nice guy? Baby d’ya got a concussion?”

- you scold him a little and soon he’s back to stroking your face and pulling you onto his lap, taking in as much as you as he possibly can.

- “Never leave me baby. Never leave me like that again.”

[starsfic]

The Monkeys of the Monastery and the Mountain

Summary: Azure Lion falls in love with Sun Wukong when visiting Master Subodhi. He also falls in love with Wukong's scowling shadow.

-_-

"Ugh, I can't believe I have to lower myself to this."

Azure Lion, steed of bodhisattva Manjusri and favored general in the celestial army, wisely did not speak up. This lord knew as well as him that he didn't have to do this. There were many other nobles in the Heavenly Court that were more qualified. This lord had just made a fool of himself at the Queen Mother's feast and just wanted to escape the inevitable gossip.

Azure couldn't blame him... much. He too wanted to escape the stifling atmosphere and all the noise of greedy nobles. If he didn't agree to "guard" this lord, he was certain that he would've stabbed either himself, the next noble who talked, or an unfortunate guard who crossed his path.

Although his choice of company only added fuel to the desire.

The clouds parted, revealing their location. The Cave of the Slanted Moon and Three Stars was a Taoist temple that clung to the side of a mountain with white walls and red roofing, subtle touches of the moon and stars here and there, like the stones on the front lawn they landed on.

The doors opened, revealing the master of the temple. Patriarch Subodhi, shifu and master to his students, walked down the stairs and came to a stop. He bowed his head. "Lord Xueqin," he said. "What brings you to my humble temple?"

"I'm here on orders of the Jade Emperor in order to check upon your teachings," the lord said, puffing up his chest. Clearly, he had noticed the lack of a full bow. "You are-"

"Under orders to not teach the forbidden ways of gaining immortality, as I have been for the past few centuries." The Taoist raised a brow. It might've been Azure's imagination, but there was a spark of panic in his eyes. "I am well aware of my orders. However, you did not need to bring a guard with you."

The lord raised a brow. "I heard what happened when Lord Fan visited your humble monastery and I just want to be sure that there are no incidents this time." Azure bit back a snicker. Everyone had heard about what happened during that visit. The fact that he spent months in his chambers and refused to go out in public without a veil was enough.

Patriarch Subodhi sighed, the panic fading from his eyes to instead be replaced by amusement. “I see. If that makes you feel better, then I welcome you both.”

Azure bowed at the waist. “It is an honor to visit, shifu.”

Subodhi did not respond, but he could see a smile tug on his lips as he turned and guided them inside.

The main courtyard was full of students, all dressed in simple grey training outfits, busy from sparring to reading to rushing to do what looked like chores. Women and men alike mixed, only marked by the fact that the women were allowed to keep their hair. One of those women met Azure’s eyes and bowed her head politely.

Azure bowed his head back before the doors to the shifu’s personal study opened. Subodhi stopped before he and the lord entered. “If you wish to wait outside, that is allowed,” he said to Azure. “We should not take too long.”

He was liking this man even more. Azure could hear the quiet offer. While it was tempting to watch Subodhi frighten this quivering noble, having never faced a foe that he couldn’t deal with via gossip, it also sounded boring to just sit there. The frightened spark in the noble’s eye sealed the deal.

“Thank you,” Azure said, giving another bow. He didn’t intend to stand outside the entire time. “It’s been a while since I’ve been allowed to stretch my legs and seeing your lovely monastery is a great excuse.”

The noble hummed, still looking terrified. Azure could see the gears thunking in his empty head. He would probably interrogate Azure on anything “suspicious” he saw. Azure doubted it. Subodhi simply nodded and led the noble inside, shutting the doors.

Azure began to walk. There was a side hallway, leading away from the main courtyard, and he took it.

The monastery was lovely, with several branching yards, most set up for training based on the sparring groups or meditation circles he saw. One led to a large herbal garden, where students tended the plants. A few were gathered around a large patch of what looked to be turmeric. “- get it,” a student said, holding a flower and turning it back and forth. “We’re all working with the same soil and supplies. How is Wukong’s stuff already flowering?”

“It’s Wukong,” another said. “He has a green thumb.”

“I know he does, but that doesn’t explain how time speeds up.”

“Again, it’s Wukong. Nature just likes him.”

“I would say it’s more than that…”

Azure walked away. While it was interesting to hear that nature apparently liked a very good gardener, that didn’t scream “Subodhi breaking the rules on teaching illegal immortality.” That just sounded like a possible affinity with the natural world or a spell to encourage plant growth. Shifty, but not illegal.

A set of large doors caught his eye. A guess made him reach out and push into the room, revealing it to be full of books. Ah, like he suspected.

Like many monasteries Azure had visited, the library was one of the largest rooms. This had to be the largest selection he had seen, though, drawing on many subjects from one glance. It wasn't a surprise, Subodhi prided himself on his knowledge and his desire to know more.

Azure studied the shelves as he walked past, taking mental notes here and there of certain books. Yellowtusk would love this library. He should recommend him for the next visit. If they waited for a century like they were supposed to, the collection would only get bigger. Azure turned the corner, still dwelling on the thought, and felt himself come to a stop.

His heart skipped a beat.

In the center of the library was a comfortable-looking sitting area, with many tables and pillows ready for someone to sit down. Large windows let in sunshine that illuminated the room during the day. However, it also illuminated the one person that sat in this room.

A monkey demon sat at the table, his golden fur lit by the sunshine, his long curls braided back. Several scrolls and loose paper were scattered around him. Golden eyes were focused on the scroll he read, one hand using ink to scrawl out notes. He wore the robes of a student, although Azure hadn’t seen any other demon students, the cuff of his writing hand stained with drops of ink here and there.

He was gorgeous.

Azure wasn’t sure how to react. He had thought people were pretty before, from soldiers who caught his eye to maids who attended the nobles. His dear sworn brothers Peng and Yellowtusk were beautiful in their own ways. But he had never seen someone like him.

It would probably be rude to just walk up and attempt to talk to him, but Azure’s longing nearly knocked him off his feet. He had the feeling that if he didn’t at least try to talk to this beauty, he would regret it for the rest of his days.

He stepped forward and cleared his throat.

“Hell-”

A tail whacked him in the face. Normally, he would brush it off, except the strike made him stumble back, caught off-guard by its strength as his breath rocked out of his lungs.

The monkey didn’t seem to notice that his wagging tail had claimed a victim. He hummed at whatever he was reading and then rolled the scroll up. Azure blinked at the ceiling as the monkey grabbed another scroll. Before he could unroll it, the doors to the library opened up.

“As you can see,” Subodhi sounded annoyed as he gestured to the library. “Nothing on immortality.”

The lord looked ragged. Azure was torn between amusement and concern- it had only been about ten minutes, if he was correct. What had happened in such a period of time?

���What about that?” the lord huffed, pointing at the golden beauty. “What is that creature? Why is it here?” He looked down and if Azure cared about his opinion, he would’ve been embarrassed. “Did it attack my guard?!”

The monkey looked up as Subodhi’s eyes went wide. “Uh, what?” He looked down and those beautiful golden eyes, like miniature suns, went wide. “Oh, crap, I am so-”

“It’s fine,” Azure rose up to his knees, raising a hand to hold the monkey’s knee. It may have been forward, but he didn’t care. “You were so focused. It was my fault for trying to interrupt you.” The monkey blinked and then smiled. It was so sweet and warm that Azure’s entire being warmed.

And then the noble spoke up.

"Is this your pet?" the lord huffed, eyeing the monkey as though he wasn't sure what to do with him. Azure felt his fur bristle protectively at the annoyed noise the monkey made as he stood, his brows furrowing tightly together and his teeth bared in a grin.

"No." Subodhi's words broke the staredown as he walked over, stepping between Azure and the monkey. He settled a hand on the monkey's shoulder and, like magic, the monkey relaxed. Not by much, but it looked better. "This is one of my students-"

"Sun Wukong," the monkey said, the name sounding more like a threat.

Azure's heart skipped a beat as he remembered the name, both from Subodhi to the students gathered around the turmeric. Sun Wukong. It was his new favorite word- it was spelled the same as the word for the sun and how fitting it was, for a monkey that glowed like the sun.

"Respect," Subodhi warned his student in a hiss. He turned back to the lord. "In any case, he is a special case and has proven himself to be one of my best students- don't get a big head about that." The last was a warning to Sun Wukong, whose frightening grimace had turned into a proud little smile.

The lord still eyed Wukong as if he was considering a threat. Azure stepped closer, but Subodhi stepped to the side, pulling Wukong with him. He wondered, for a second, if he imagined the nasty glare that the elder shot him before the man cleared his throat. "In any case, I believe it's best that you leave."

"Not until-" the lord protested.

"Is there anything else you honestly need to see?" Subodhi said, his voice stern. However, Azure could see his hand flexing in and out on Wukong's shoulder. Based on the wince that trembled the smaller's form, so could Wukong.

"If I may speak up," Azure said, stepping around Subodhi to hover on Wukong's other side. "I have been walking around the monastery and I have seen nothing that suggests Patriarch Subodhi has violated the law. While Wukong is a surprise-" That time, he was certain. Subodhi was glaring at him. "He's not a violation. He's clearly a good student based on the ink marks on his cuffs."

The lord huffed, glaring at the three of them. Finally, he nodded. "Fine," he said, like a toddler denied of a toy. "You pass inspection."

Subodhi bowed his head. "Thank you," he said, unwrapping that protective arm from Wukong to make a shooing motion with his swatter. The lord turned an interesting shade of red. "Now, please leave. You're interrupting my student's study."

The lord huffed again and stormed out of the library. Azure trailed behind, feeling Subodhi follow close behind. He glanced back and met Wukong's golden eyes before the monkey sat back down at his study spot. He probably looked weird with the smile he felt forming, but that wasn’t important.

I hope I can talk to you again soon.

-_-

Unfortunately, Azure didn't get a chance to talk to Sun Wukong before he left the monastery.

He didn't do it every day, but at least once a month, Azure would slip to Earth, conveniently near Subodhi's monastery. The first time hadn't been on purpose. Another celestial steed had gotten loose and was trying to take over a village. Azure and Peng had been successfully wrangling the cursing creature until Azure's eye caught a hint of sunshine. There had been a group of familiar uniforms, the front being Sun Wukong, vibrating so hard that about three students had to keep him in place.

The steed kicking him in his face was his own fault. He would give Peng that.

With the realization, Azure started hanging around the village and the mountain at least once a month to at least see the pretty monkey. He had good reason! Power-hungry demons stalked this area, interested in Subodhi's students. He was being helpful!

Subodhi didn't seem to get that. Every time they ran into each other, Subodhi's friendly look faded more and more from the first time. Azure made the mistake of asking about Wukong one time, and his hands were bleeding for days from shielding his head. It didn’t stop him from visiting.

He would just have to keep things quiet.

"You know that Wukong doesn't live here anymore, right?"

"Excuse me?"

The student who had walked up to him stared steadily back. "He got expelled two days ago. Apparently, for showing off the special lessons Shifu was teaching him, I guess? But he's not here."

Azure's heart sank. Two days ago. He had missed the perfect chance to talk to him, to maybe comfort him. Being expelled had to be hard, right? "I- Where does he live?"

"I dunno, someplace called Huago? All I know is that it's on the west coast and there's a lot of monkeys." The student hiked up the bag of groceries they had probably come for in the first place. "All I know is that he's not here, so you can stop stalking us." And with that, they walked away.

Azure didn’t realize he was moving until a shadow slammed into his face.

He stumbled back, the portal he summoned thankfully dissipating before he went back through. He looked around, realizing he was in the middle of a jungle. He was much higher than he expected- was he on a mountain? In the distance, he could see something shining, darting around a larger figure in armor. He knew that gleam, even when the power running through didn’t exist.

Before he could step towards it, another shadow wrapped around his chest, hard enough to crush his ribs, and yanked him to the ground. “I guess you were the celestial warrior Subodhi warned me about,” a voice said from overheard. Azure looked up and, once again, his heart raced.

Unlike Wukong, who was soft and glowing with sunshine, this monkey was hard and dark, all except his eyes. Those eyes gleamed with violent violet power. His clothes were a mess, ripped and torn and dirty, cuffs tight on his wrists. Chains wrapped around the muscle of his arm, the ends broken. It didn’t stop the fact that he was beautiful, dark curls cut to frame his handsome, blood-stained face.

Was it just those two, or were all monkeys so lovely?

The monkey clapped his hands and purple sparks darted out. When he pulled them apart, a staff like the one he saw Wukong wield sometimes formed, glowing and made of the same magic that held Azure down. Unlike Wukong’s staff, both ends were spiked. If he got hit with that, Azure was certain it would be nasty.

“I’m surprised you even had the courage to try and follow Wukong here,” the warrior said. “While the Demon King of Confusion surprised me, small fry like you don’t.”

And with that, the monkey dove down and Azure barely had enough time to escape his bindings.

It became a blur of fighting- dodge, strike, uppercut, taste your blood in your mouth, hit him back, don’t feel bad. As he fought and dodged, Azure wondered if sparring like Wukong would be like this. Was this warrior just as studious as Wukong was? They appeared similar far away and up close, save for the color of their fur and the color of their power, how far did those similarities go?

Azure found himself tumbling into the brush with one good strike that definitely bruised his ribs. Through the shrubbery, he could see the warrior tense, ready to follow, but a loud crash that sounded like boulders falling, the sound of several panicked monkeys, and a loud “MIHOU!” made him pause. He glanced back and then nodded before he disappeared, the shadows swallowing him up.

Azure waited before summoning another portal, this time focusing on the warrior. His portal was kind enough to drop him off in another patch of shrubbery so he was hidden from the scene.

The giant demon was collapsed on the ground, the air smelling of blood. Wukong was bathed in red, so much so that Azure’s fingers twitched with the need to grab him and clean him until he saw the golden fur. The warrior- Mihou, based on the yell- hovered next to him. It appeared the two were concerned about each other, talking over each other and reaching out and holding each other. A loud cry of a monkey turned their attention away from each other to the small, white-furred monkeys gathering around them. Wukong beamed, his smile warming Azure’s heart, as he reached down and scooped several up in his arms, allowing the rest to climb over him and Mihou. The warrior didn’t protest, his gaze so tender that it made him melt.

He didn’t realize it until then, but his heart had room for two.

He just needed to figure out how.

-_-

A few years passed and Azure finally felt it was time to make his move.

It hurt when Sun Wukong didn't recognize him when he offered his services and his brotherhood. But Azure brushed it off. The course of love never did run smooth- Macaque didn't seem to recognize him either, but he sometimes noticed him squinting at him, as if he thought him familiar but wasn't sure why.

Peng and Yellowtusk had their doubts about Wukong's leadership ability, but Azure was certain that his love could lead. His kindness to his people was far greater than the Jade Emperor's compassion towards the entire universe. He had his doubts about Macaque as a consort, but that didn't matter at the moment.

Especially not when he was presenting him with flowers.

"They reminded me of you," he said. It was true- the asters and plum blossoms reminded him of the color of Macaque's magic and his favorite fruit. In his opinion, this was a good test-run bouquet.

Macaque blinked and then eyed him as if waiting for a joke. Azure kept his face open and honest, hoping that Macaque would accept the gift. The shadow monkey finally hummed, taking the bouquet. "Thank...you, Azure, these are-"

A golden blur rushed between them and slapped the bouquet straight out of Macaque's hands. Both monkey and lion blinked as the bouquet disappeared into the distance before a larger bouquet of flowers, leaning towards red and pink, was stuffed in the former's hands.

"Macaque prefers it when I give him flowers," Sun Wukong huffed, crossing his arms with a pout. Azure opened his mouth, unsure of how to respond to that, before his love turned to his moon. His stance grew gentler. “These are the right colors, right? For the last big scene of your play?”

“Ye- Yeah, they are!” Macaque held the flowers closer. His eyes shone as he smiled and Azure felt his heart skip a beat. “I didn’t think you would remember what I said.”

“Pssh, of course! You’ve been working on that play for weeks!”

Azure relaxed in the sun, enjoying the sight of their smiles. This was just a hiccup. There would be plenty of time to court his monkeys of monastery and mountain.

[murrpa]

heart wrecking angst⇩

•

•

•

In Deadpool 4, Logan discovers his presence in Wades universe messes up cycle of events and if he continues to live in it— the universe can collapse (butterfly effect kind of thing), so in the end of the movie B-15 and minute men show up dramatically a they do at Wades apartment, and escort Logan back into the headquarters planning to send him back to his “home”. Both Logan and Wade see the scale of this, and Wade soon is taken to talk to him one last time before never seeing him again since B-15 felt generous that day. So she give them this moment.

Wade scoffs: So now is the time? Hah, I should’ve known, TVA has every event written down to nanoseconds… I swear, it puts someone’s strict mother’s skill to plan the whole year in advance and never let her kid see the light of day without her permission at shame!

All that while Logan looks at him. Though he has so much to say, to confess, but decides not to do it, maybe because it’ll hurt letting him go more than it already is.

Wade approaches him: I… ugh, was not prepared, otherwise I would’ve pulled out my 100 page essay and read it to you in British accent as you walk further away from me into the sunset.

Logan: Wade?

Wade: Yeah?

Logan struggles. What is there to say now? His heart is aching, and cracks with each passing second there’s left. He wanted to say his life was at its fullest by Wade’s side, how he’s now changed man, all because of him. For him. That he will continue being that person in his world simply because Wade will be proud.

Logan: I might have my own place, my house and whatnot… But I never dared to call it my home, y’know?

Wade listens, no longer daring to quip a sound. And hazel eyes of Logan glisten in nothing but sadness. If that emotion could be painted— it would be him. Right now.

Logan: I wish the world was on my side, fair to me, to us, Wade.

His voice shakes. And he no longer cares to control the tear that soon oozes out the corner of an eye, to his hope, telling at least a tenth of all what his heart wants to say. Then it finally hits merc. Is this really it?

Wade: Peanut, I promise, it’s okay.

No. It fucking hurts. Wade never hated to say goodbye so damn much like now, but understands, that to love someone is letting them go.

He’s only doing it for Logan, for his universe. Sure there’s something that’s waiting for him, something better than this. Which what Logan deserves, after non consensual involvement in Wade’s goal to save his own world. After what he had been through.

Logan softly sobs: It shouldn’t be, I wish I had a choice. Because coming back is long time off my list.

Wade realizes his emotions reveal, a hot heavy tear drops off his chin, and fake but bitter smile grows to comfort Wolverine. Ignoring everything what’s falling into pieces in his chest.

Wade: I just… I just never want you to get into dangerous shit cause of me. I want you to be okay.

But Logan doesn’t care, even if his old life promises to be as peaceful as Swedish government. In the end, being next to Wade— suddenly makes chaos worth it.

Logan: I was okay, Wade, I was… so happy— but as soon as my foot steps through the teleporter…

Logan breaks as more tears rush down his face. His gaze locked with Wade’s.

Logan: … I will comeback being the same pitty guy you picked up at the bar.

But Wade protests.

Wade: No, nope, you’ll comeback better than ever.

He gives up smiling, then reaching out for the man, locking him in the most loving hug, arms wrapping waist, one digging fingertips into the shirt, and second one cards Logan’s hair. Which makes older man hate himself for not hugging Wade often before, when they were so happy, and lived under one roof not knowing this day would come.

Wade: You are, and always will be the best wolverine.

Logan hides his face in Wade’s neck, ashamed someone might see him, how destroyed he is with pain of leaving him, forever.

Wade: Thank you infinitely, for staying, saving my world.

Wade’s hushed voice sends chills, and throat begins to burn, yearning to say one last thing as he hears footsteps approaching.

Logan: Thank you for becoming mine.

(lmk if you’re interested in me writing full fic based off of this💛❤️)